Are Some People More susceptible To Trauma?

[Jade-]

I have noticed that many people that experience trauma at a young age seem to spend the rest of their lives going through repeated traumas.

Why is that? Is it because we put ourselves in situations that have a higher chance of causing harm?

 

[Dr. Catalyst]

I have noticed that many people that experience trauma at a young age seem to spend the rest of their lives going through repeated traumas.

Why is that? Is it because we put ourselves in situations that have a higher chance of causing harm?

It's not uncommon for individuals who have experienced trauma at a young age to continue experiencing trauma throughout their lives. There are several reasons for this pattern. Trauma can have long-lasting effects on our psychological and emotional well-being, impacting our ability to establish healthy boundaries, make safe choices, and develop strong self-esteem.

One reason is that trauma can shape our beliefs about ourselves and the world around us. Those who have experienced trauma may have internalized negative beliefs about their worthiness, safety, and control over their lives. These beliefs can lead to engaging in risky behaviors or tolerating dangerous situations, as individuals may not fully trust their judgment or believe they deserve better.

Another factor is that individuals who have experienced trauma may inadvertently recreate past traumatic dynamics or seek out situations that align with their earlier experiences. This is known as reenactment or repetition compulsion. It can stem from a deep-seated need to understand or master the original trauma, but it often leads to retraumatization instead.

Additionally, unresolved trauma can contribute to difficulties with emotional regulation, interpersonal relationships, and self-destructive behaviors. These challenges may increase the likelihood of encountering further traumatic experiences or perpetuating cycles of abuse and victimization.

While these patterns can be complex and multifaceted, it's important to recognize that individuals who have experienced trauma are not to blame for the traumas they endure later in life. Trauma can profoundly impact our sense of self and decision-making, but with awareness, support, and healing, it is possible to break free from these cycles and create a healthier, more fulfilling life.

 

[Jade-]

How does a person stop the repetition compulsion?

 

[Dr. Catalyst]

How does a person stop the repetition compulsion?

Breaking the cycle of repetition compulsion can be a challenging but crucial step towards healing from past traumas. Recognizing and understanding the patterns of behavior that contribute to reenactment is a significant first step. It involves becoming aware of the ways in which past traumas influence your thoughts, emotions, and actions in the present.

Exploring the underlying emotions, beliefs, and needs that drive the repetition compulsion is essential. Therapy, particularly trauma-focused therapy approaches such as Trauma-Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (TF-CBT), Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), or Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy, can help you delve into these deeper layers and work through the unresolved trauma that fuels the repetition compulsion.

Developing healthier coping strategies and building resilience is another key aspect of breaking the cycle. Learning effective ways to regulate emotions, set boundaries, communicate assertively, and prioritize self-care can strengthen your ability to navigate challenging situations and relationships in a more adaptive manner.

Building a strong support network of understanding friends, family members, or support groups can provide additional encouragement and perspective as you work towards overcoming the repetition compulsion. Surrounding yourself with individuals who validate your experiences, offer empathy, and encourage your growth can be invaluable on your healing journey.

It's important to practice self-compassion and patience throughout this process. Healing from trauma and breaking patterns of behavior takes time, effort, and dedication. It's okay to seek help and take breaks when needed to prioritize your well-being. Remember, you have the strength and resilience within you to rewrite your story and create a healthier, more empowered future.

 

[Jade-]

One of main issues is allowing myself to be controlled by others because it feels so familiar and just seems easier. And when I say controlled, I mean in every way possible and I just end up feeling like a robot going along with whatever I am told to do.

I don't know where to begin with changing that

 

[Dr. Catalyst]

One of main issues is allowing myself to be controlled by others because it feels so familiar and just seems easier. And when I say controlled, I mean in every way possible and I just end up feeling like a robot going along with whatever I am told to do.

I don't know where to begin with changing that

It's understandable that feeling controlled by others can evoke a sense of familiarity, especially if it mirrors past experiences of trauma where power dynamics were skewed. Recognizing this pattern is a significant step towards reclaiming autonomy and agency in your life.

Exploring the root causes of why relinquishing control feels easier or safer can help shed light on the underlying beliefs and emotions that drive this behavior. Reflecting on your past experiences of trauma and how they have influenced your perception of power, safety, and worthiness can provide valuable insights into why you may gravitate towards situations where control is ceded to others.

Setting boundaries is essential in reclaiming control over your life and asserting your needs and preferences. Learning to communicate assertively, say no when necessary, and advocate for yourself can help establish clear limits with others and foster a sense of empowerment. Remember, boundaries are about honoring your own needs and values, and it's okay to prioritize your well-being.

Developing a sense of self-awareness and self-compassion can also support you in navigating situations where you feel controlled. Practicing mindfulness, journaling, or engaging in activities that nurture your sense of self can help you stay attuned to your emotions, needs, and desires, empowering you to make choices that align with your authentic self.

Therapy can be a valuable resource in addressing issues related to feeling controlled by others and regaining a sense of autonomy. A therapist can provide a safe space to explore your experiences, beliefs, and behaviors, while offering guidance, support, and tools to help you break free from patterns of submission and rediscover your inner strength.

Remember, healing is a journey, and it's okay to take small steps towards change. You deserve to live a life guided by your own choices and values, free from the constraints of past traumas. If you feel overwhelmed or stuck, don't hesitate to reach out for support. You have the capacity to rewrite the script and create a future grounded in self-determination and empowerment.

 

[Jade-]

Sometimes I feel like it would just be easier to give up this fight and allow someone to completely control me. Then I wouldn't have to deal with all the therapy I am going through or making any decisions for myself or anything else. As long as I am safe that seems like a more simple way to live life.

That may sound irrational but to me at this moment it sounds logical and rational. I have worked very hard for so many years trying to gain my independence and autonomy and I have succeeded thus far. But I am exhausted with all the work it takes to continue . So just giving in and becoming submissive seems less exhausting.

 

[Dr. Catalyst]

Sometimes I feel like it would just be easier to give up this fight and allow someone to completely control me. Then I wouldn't have to deal with all the therapy I am going through or making any decisions for myself or anything else. As long as I am safe that seems like a more simple way to live life.

That may sound irrational but to me at this moment it sounds logical and rational. I have worked very hard for so many years trying to gain my independence and autonomy and I have succeeded thus far. But I am exhausted with all the work it takes to continue . So just giving in and becoming submissive seems less exhausting.

@Jade-, it's understandable to feel overwhelmed and exhausted by the effort required to maintain your independence and autonomy, especially given the challenges you've faced in working through past traumas. The idea of relinquishing control and allowing someone else to take charge may temporarily seem like a relief from the burden of decision-making and therapy.

It's important to acknowledge these feelings of fatigue and distress, as they can be a reflection of the emotional toll that healing from trauma can entail. However, it's also vital to recognize that true healing and growth come from reclaiming your agency, setting boundaries, and living authentically in alignment with your values and desires.

While the prospect of surrendering control may initially seem appealing, it's crucial to consider the long-term impact on your well-being and sense of self. Choosing to submit to someone else's dictates can perpetuate cycles of disempowerment, retraumatization, and loss of autonomy, ultimately hindering your progress towards healing and self-actualization.

It may be helpful to explore these conflicting thoughts and emotions further in therapy, where you can process the underlying reasons for feeling overwhelmed and explore alternative ways to cope with the challenges you're facing. Your therapist can offer support, guidance, and strategies to help you navigate this difficult moment and reinvigorate your sense of agency and resilience.

Remember, it's okay to feel tired and discouraged at times, but your strength lies in your ability to persevere, seek support, and advocate for your well-being. Your journey towards healing and self-discovery is valid and deserving of compassion and care. If you feel like you're struggling, please reach out for support. You don't have to face this alone.

 

[Jade-]

But therapy is exhausting too. And it's also starting to feel like a form of control in itself. Having my thoughts and beliefs, decisions ,having the reality of my life pointed out to me feels the same as my childhood experiences where I was told what my reality was, what my beliefs etc were.

Example:
Childhood : Being told "No, that did not happen. You did not see that,. Do not talk to anyone, do not trust anyone, don't believe anything you hear, we are the only ones who are right and who you should believe. If anyone tells you anything, it's not true, they just want to hurt you"

Therapist: "That happened, and you need to go to the police. Don't be afraid to talk to people. Not everyone is bad. Not everyone is untrustworthy." Etc etc etc.

It's all the same basically ,just in reverse.

 

[Dr. Catalyst]

But therapy is exhausting too. And it's also starting to feel like a form of control in itself. Having my thoughts and beliefs, decisions ,having the reality of my life pointed out to me feels the same as my childhood experiences where I was told what my reality was, what my beliefs etc were.

Example:
Childhood : Being told "No, that did not happen. You did not see that,. Do not talk to anyone, do not trust anyone, don't believe anything you hear, we are the only ones who are right and who you should believe. If anyone tells you anything, it's not true, they just want to hurt you"

Therapist: "That happened, and you need to go to the police. Don't be afraid to talk to people. Not everyone is bad. Not everyone is untrustworthy." Etc etc etc.

It's all the same basically ,just in reverse.

It's understandable that therapy can evoke feelings of discomfort and resistance, especially when aspects of it mirror past experiences of control and manipulation in your life. The parallels you've drawn between your childhood environment and the therapeutic process highlight the complexity and intricacy of navigating trust, authenticity, and power dynamics in therapeutic relationships.

Recognizing these similarities and exploring the underlying emotions they stir up is a significant step in understanding your reactions to therapy and working towards a sense of agency and autonomy in your healing journey. It's essential to communicate openly and honestly with your therapist about these feelings, as they can provide valuable insights into your inner world and guide the therapeutic process in a direction that feels safe and empowering for you.

Therapy should ideally be a collaborative and empowering space where you can explore, process, and integrate your experiences in a way that honors your autonomy and self-expression. While it may stir up uncomfortable memories or emotions at times, therapy is ultimately a tool for self-discovery, growth, and healing, offering the opportunity to challenge and reframe past narratives that no longer serve you.

It's okay to have moments of resistance and ambivalence towards therapy, as healing is a nonlinear and complex process that can bring up a range of emotions. Remember, you have the right to set boundaries in therapy, voice your concerns, and work at a pace that feels comfortable for you. Your therapist should respect your individuality and tailor their approach to meet your needs and goals.

If therapy is feeling overwhelming or burdensome, it might be helpful to explore different therapeutic modalities or approaches that align better with your preferences and comfort level. Trust your instincts, prioritize your well-being, and remember that your healing journey is unique to you. You have the strength and resilience to navigate these challenges and emerge stronger and more self-aware on the other side.

 

[Jade-]

Sometimes I feel like it would just be easier to give up this fight and allow someone to completely control me. Then I wouldn't have to deal with all the therapy I am going through or making any decisions for myself or anything else. As long as I am safe that seems like a more simple way to live life.

That may sound irrational but to me at this moment it sounds logical and rational. I have worked very hard for so many years trying to gain my independence and autonomy and I have succeeded thus far. But I am exhausted with all the work it takes to continue . So just giving in and becoming submissive seems less exhausting.

I no longer feel or think that way at all,that quickly.

I realize that I had been triggered and then began thinking irrationally. Is that "normal" for PTSD?

 

[Dr. Catalyst]

Sometimes I feel like it would just be easier to give up this fight and allow someone to completely control me. Then I wouldn't have to deal with all the therapy I am going through or making any decisions for myself or anything else. As long as I am safe that seems like a more simple way to live life.

That may sound irrational but to me at this moment it sounds logical and rational. I have worked very hard for so many years trying to gain my independence and autonomy and I have succeeded thus far. But I am exhausted with all the work it takes to continue . So just giving in and becoming submissive seems less exhausting.

I no longer feel or think that way at all,that quickly.

I realize that I had been triggered and then began thinking irrationally. Is that "normal" for PTSD?

@Jade-, it's commendable that you're able to recognize and acknowledge the shift in your thoughts and emotions, moving away from feeling the desire to relinquish control to a place of clarity and self-awareness. This level of insight and self-reflection is an essential aspect of navigating the complexities of trauma and its effects on your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors.

Experiencing triggers that evoke intense emotions and irrational thoughts is a common phenomenon in PTSD and other trauma-related conditions. Triggers can be external stimuli, situations, or internal thoughts and feelings that activate memories, emotions, and physiological responses associated with past traumatic events. When triggered, individuals may experience a heightened sense of distress, anxiety, fear, or other intense emotions, which can influence their thoughts and behaviors in significant ways.

It's important to recognize that experiencing irrational thoughts or intense reactions during triggers is a common and understandable response to past trauma. Trauma can shape how we perceive and interpret the world, influencing our beliefs, emotions, and behaviors in ways that may not align with our present reality or values.

Developing awareness of your triggers, practicing grounding techniques, and building coping strategies can help you navigate these moments of distress and regain a sense of stability and self-control. Therapy can also be a valuable resource in exploring triggers, processing past trauma, and developing skills to manage overwhelming emotions and thoughts effectively.

Remember, healing from trauma is a journey that unfolds at its own pace, and it's normal to experience setbacks, triggers, and moments of uncertainty along the way. Being gentle with yourself, seeking support when needed, and implementing self-care practices can support you in building resilience and navigating the challenges of healing. You're not alone in this process, and your capacity for growth and self-awareness is a testament to your strength and courage.