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Arghh! Nothings going right… so I self harm

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I’m sitting here going out of my mind with the thoughts in my head & my apparently automatic reaction to fight thinking these thoughts.

So I cigarette burnt myself. Helped a little but not anymore so going to do it again.

I don’t really care… so I’ll get a scar from the blisters.

But I’m just wondering if there’s another way to deal???
I'm also going out of my mind.

Can you distract yourself with TV, radio or a book. Maybe call a crisis or help line? Self harm is a terrible thing to do. Please don't do it. Maybe make yourself some nice food.
But I’m just wondering if there’s another way to deal???
Of course there are. Hundreds of ways.

But since self harm is the way you know inside out & backwards (what it will do, what the consequences are, what it won’t do, etc.), AND you’re used to it, so it’s a knee-jerk response? That’s what you do.

Fair warning = I’ve never yet found a single coping mechanism I can replace with another coping mechanism. Instead? I usually need to replace it with 2 or 3, and often more. Why? Because each coping mechanism is it’s own unique cocktail of what it does. In order to find THAT cocktail, that works so well, elsewhere? I have to sub A with B that does this, and C that does that, and D that counters this, and E that does this other thing… all to get the same effect. <<< Which probably sounds awful. But it’s the opposite. Because it’s replacing one thing I don’t want with 2/3/4/+ things I DO want in my life? Is kind of f*cking amazing.

It also means I suddenly have a whole damn Arsenal to choose from, once I’ve honed those other coping mechanisms to the point that I know them inside out and backwards and can knee jerk to the best possible combos in countless situations/scenarios. Instead of just one thing. Shrug.

Very much like having a whole closet full of clothes for different seasons & situations, instead of 1 outfit. Or a fridge of food (or take out menu) instead of just I thing I eat for every meal.

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