Connects directly to this:I know that today when she started talking about all that stuff yet again I just felt hopeless and worthless and couldn't interrupt or say anything. I don't remember how I've reacted the other times. Maybe I did the same thing.
I know the emotions are different - but part of what needs addressing is that she now knows you two are misunderstanding each other. The only way to work through that is, to work at talking it out face to face. It sounds like you have trouble expressing when you feel vulnerable and exposed - and that is bound to come up, as part of this discussion around how she's missed the mark on your experience. I think doing it in-session is going to be much more useful, for both you and her.My point about voicing grievances is that she doesn't want me to voice them except in session - so that would include sending a letter. That is why I said it feels coercive. I am not aware of any other profession that demands that all communications be face to face, let alone a one way communication to express displeasure. I am a pretty direct person. I am definitely not scared of telling her I am angry at her to her face. I have done so many times. The issue here is that I did not become angry until I left.