Today I took a massive step forward. I simply had a hair cut and colour. I know this sounds such a normal thing to do for most people. For me it is facing a huge part of my past. For 52 years I have lived with abuse, trauma, control and violence. My ex husband forced me to keep my hair long and bleached blonde. Today a lovely hair dresser came to my home and spent 6 hours helping me to take this step. I have gone from waist long hair to a chin length style. Gone is one of his weapons!!!!! Now the negative thoughts and feelings have crept in. The fear of him finding out what I have done is overwhelming me and I'm battling to hang on to the positive thing I have completed. Do any of you have the same feelings? is so how do you deal with them?.