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Bedroom talk

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echo

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Bedroom talk is confidential. Just between us. But my ptsd diagnosis is directly related to sex. Where does that leave me
 
Well... if you do emdr, you don’t have to say much. However, I am confused. You consider stuff you do in the bedroom the same as stuff that happened in your trauma?

Sometimes, I do bring stuff up to my T, like “he did something, it caused me to have a flashback.” Then she might say, how did you handle it, or what happened next, but it is still as private and non-detailed as I want it to be.

Also, your T is like a doctor. Sometimes your doctor has to see the rash or private parts of you to heal you or know what is going on.

I think when trust is established you may be more comfortable with all of this. However, abuse and intimate bedroom stuff are not the same thing.
 
I do not go to therapy.
I do not think I will survive it.

in regards to talking about it. if that's where my ptsd comes from, yet bedroom talk stays in the bedroom. so that leaves me talking about it with my husband only.
 
My Trauma is also sex related and has caused so many issues. It has helped me immensely opening up with my T about what my husband and I do in the bedroom. We have only very recently started on this topic. I don't/ wont give her unnecessary details or go too graphic but I trust her and if I want to regain my sex life then I need to be able to tell her what happens and whats going on. My husband is very supportive of this.

I would urge you to find a good T and be open with them.
 
I've never been to a T...my partner knows roughly about details of my past, but not specific details.
In the early years we did come across problems, and I was able to say no or he would read my reaction and stop. I never needed to offer up explanation.....its part of respecting someone, to notice that they are not in the zone, or whatever.
I did spend a lot of time emphasizing that it was not him, but something from my past, which he accepted without question.
 
I do not go to therapy.
I do not think I will survive it.

in regards to talking about it. if that's wher...
In my opinion only, you have to talk about it as you just said. You are trying to talk about it. Please find a therapist, I am saying this because I did it the same way sort of. Your husband is your husband. He's not a therapist. You feel like you won't survive it because it's trying to come out and you can't maybe hold it back anymore and "in my opinion" it's like trying to stop a baby from being born or the tide from coming in? This is my therapists website. They have some resources. I hope you get help. It is very brave you came and asked. You're not alone. My PTSD is all about sex and I spoke to my wife about it first.
About These people and my therapist specialize in CSA/sexual abuse/trauma. Ask me anything if you need to. You are going to be ok. If you had not said anything then it might look not so good but you are trying! That is really good!
 
thank you so much. I do want to respect his / our confidentiality boundaries but it is complicated because that leaves only him I talk to about it and I really struggle knowing what's healthy and what isn't. I do trust him when I'm present but when I'm not, I know I don't, otherwise I would not have trouble staying present. I think. I don't know. I've just recently learned there is a name for leaving. I don't understand it at all yet. leaving would scare me if it weren't scarier that I don't particularly mind being gone. I hope this make sense.
 
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