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Death BFF's nephew stillborn

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gealach

MyPTSD Pro
I just found out an hour ago, that my best friend's nephew was stillborn tonight. They are all just devastated. Mom and baby were healthy for the whole pregnancy, and the labour was good, so they don't know what happened. Just that they got to the end of the labour, and the baby didn't make it. I was so excited for my friend to be an auntie, when she messaged me this morning that the baby was on the way. It was exciting all day, just waiting for the news that the baby was finally here. And now just the most devastating outcome possible. And because of covid, none of the family is together, and no one can get together. They can't be together to comfort each other. I can't even be with my friend tonight to comfort her ?
 
Such awful news, gealach. I am so sorry for their loss.
My thoughts with you, BFF's sister and the whole family.
Be kind to yourself :hug:
 
I'm sorry for their loss and all of you' incredibly difficult time, Gealach.

May the baby rest in peace.
Loss of kids hurts like nothing else.

Kind thoughts to you.
 
@gealach, it’s such a devastating loss and there’s never the right words to say to friends and loved ones when these things happen.

Your friendship, love, and empathy for BFF will shine I’m sure. Even without words, your spirit will be open for BFF.

Sending you warmth
 
well crap.

I am so sorry. this is horrible.
And I don't know how to help BFF through this. She's just devastated. ?
there isn't anything you can do other than just be there for her. Let her cry, let her rage, let her talk, let her be silent. This isn't something you can fix - but by being there she has someone to lean on while she walks down this horrible path and recovers.

She is very lucky to have you as a BFF. :hug:
 
Thanks everyone! Your words and kindness are appreciated.

I'm feeling pretty helpless and useless right now. Under non-pandemic circumstances I would have just told BFF I was driving up last night, and I would have been there for her, not even an option to not be there. But with this virus, the stay home orders, and physical distancing, I can't do that for her. I would feel even worse if she was home alone, but thank goodness her fiance is there with her so she has some support IRL.

So I'm doing the only things I can do, I guess. I checked up on her a few times, had a nonsense conversation about me going back on car, calculated that she's worth $10,000 as a friend (long story, but got her laughing), and offered to run errands for her or be her chauffeur, or whatever else I can get done for her. It's not much, it's not enough, but it's all I've got. I just don't want her to go through this friendless.
 
Sorry April is that for you and that mess rain keeps on raining with another loss, @gealach.

You're far from useless :tup: You're a good friend and there for yours in heart breaking circumstances. Everything you're doing for her as well as 'just' being there matters.

And everything you'd love to do and want and can't aren't things making you useless... they are a proof of how damn brilliant, dedicated, loving, skilled, helpful and so many things and qualities you are. :sneaky:
 
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