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Can You Tell if This Person has PTSD?

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anthony

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Got my first piece of hate mail today because of this forum, and I must say, I'm impressed. I say that because I have been in the online marketing industry for nearly 10 years now on and off, and run other sites, and hav received plenty of hate mail before, but this is the first for this forum, so here it is for your viewing pleasure.

Sorry if this is going to the wrong place. I am trying to get this message to whomever runs the PTSD forum. He runs it but he doesn't want anyone with PTSD contacting him. Strange isn't it? Anyway, if you could pass it along to the correct person for : [DLMURL]http://www.ptsdforum.org/[/DLMURL] I would greatly appreciate it. Before I signed up for the forum I wanted to make a comment and get a response to it.

I have PTSD and I do understand your logo but I am not a combat veteran. My PTSD comes from spending most of my childhood being tortured by an abusive, alcoholic, bi-polar, PTSD riddled, father pointing a gun at myself and my brother and threatening to kill us on an almost nightly basis. Looking down the barrel of a cartoon gun makes me feel sick. There are many non-combat PTSD people who do have the same anger and rage symptoms represented by your logo but in the case of female rape victims, and childhood abuse victims, those up-close hand guns represent the means of intimidation that started their symptoms in the first place.

Recent studies show that women are much more likely to develop PTSD than men in similar situations. I think you should consider a logo that the full range of people dealing with this difficult condition can identify with. My father would have loved the logo. He had PTSD too. (fought in WWII and Korea and saw and had to do some horrible things. His condition is what led to the torture he inflicted on our family.)

Just an opinion,

MW

Ok... I can tell you have PTSD, because you insult me whilst you ask me a question. No probs. I actually had to send this to Kerrie-Ann this morning, asking what to do with it, because I wasn't really in the frame of mind this morning to deal with people nicely, to say the least.

So, this afternoon, when I felt better, I responded, as tactfully as I get.

Hi Martha,

First off all, your rubbing me up the wrong way with broad statements that you made within your opening paragraph, "He runs it but he doesn't want anyone with PTSD contacting him. Strange isn't it?" Actually, last time I looked, I was entitled to my privacy as much as you are yours. I am quite readily available for contact "upon" the forum through posting, private messaging, or you can even email myself from the forum direct.

Now, the forum logo. Martha, the forum logo has nothing to do with veterans. If that is what you think, then your perception of the logo is incorrect. That one logo, as they rotate through various types, depicts the characterists of a person with PTSD, being that whilst something may upset a person, its not wise to upset a person with PTSD. That is what the logo depicts, which has nothing to do with veterans or war.

I understand your concerns, but the logo has purpose and meaning, and you are the first person to ever say if offended you, considering that logo, and the site, has already been praised and awarded for its design characteristics in relation to PTSD and the mental illness itself. Such things as the black and white design, depicting how we with PTSD think, mixing in the grey, being how we need to think, and then a splash of colour, being how people without PTSD process thoughts.

Honestly, if you have a fear of a cartoon gun on a logo, which illustrates a characteristic within a particular set of persons, then you have a long way to go with your PTSD. The forum contains people of all walks of life, and who have obtained PTSD from a wide sphere of realms, including those with guns. Those very people applaud that logo for what it stands for, and the reasoning behind it. If you read about the forum first ( [DLMURL]http://www.ptsdforum.org/forum11.html[/DLMURL] ) you would have realized this.

I understand that you have had a significantly poor life in relation to abuse, but so do many people. Your not alone with this. If the forum is not for you, then that is your choice, as it helps many people already, so its achieving its ongoing aim. I never said it is for everybody, nor could help everybody. It is about providing a support mechanism, so people can chat with others in a common place who know and understand what they are feeling, suffered, suffering and so forth. I have been through the worst of PTSD, and I have come out the other side, by pushing my fears aside and fighting my trauma head on. It is the only way you can make yourself better.

I would love to have you push yourself past the logo, to be quite honest, and talk with others who have suffered similar to yourself, providing you an escape from yourself at times, which we all need. I'm sorry the logo makes you feel that way, but the overall importance of that logo stems further than one person, and actually provides substance to an illness we endure each day. It helps provide some purpose to those who doubt our every action, those who don't have PTSD, being those who could never truly understand what we suffer on a daily basis, regardless how you got it, all symptoms are the same.

Regards,

Anthony Parsons.

So I then get back...

Most web sites have a "contact the web administrator" button on them. That is not an unreasonable request. Nor is it unreasonable to listen to feedback on your website. I can sure tell you have PTSD and possibly some other disorder that makes you act like an insensitive asshole so take your web site and shove it. I'll look for support elsewhere.

You are an idiot.

So, offcourse I must respond with some sarcasm!!!

Hi Martha,

Your welcome. Funny you say that you could see I have PTSD, when I thought the same thing actually from your initial spiteful email and comments.

Thanks,

Anthony Parsons.

I personally think I was quite restrained... so does Kerrie. I actually took note of this ladies writing style, and immediately recognised it... because this is how I used to write or speak with people when I had PTSD in full flight. I was really a very cranky, grumpy bear, and very unapproachable, though I think I have gotten much better over time...

I think this person has the wrong idea about me, and this forum, in that its not the forum that necessarily needs her, but instead her that needs the forum. She confused the issue with me as the owner / creator of the forum vs. the actual purpose of the forum. This board belongs to all registered members and readers in a way, because instead of me seeing it as mine, I view this forum as a community that I am lucky enough to be part off. I actually don't see it any other way.

Its purpose is not about one person being dictative to everyone else, ie. a leader, it is about each and every person shareing their experience, trauma and feelings to one another, and gaining some sort of respite from the blank look, little understanding physician. Its about each and every person being able to find someone/s that they can relate too and fall upon for advice and just a lending ear when needed for support.

I guess what I am trying to say is, that this board is more like a therapeudic way to get better, being that each one of us deal with our daily PTSD problems together, with support and actual true understanding of each others symptoms.

The only negative aspect that I personally see from this persons spite from me not blatantly plastering my phone number all over here so she has 24hr access to me personally, is that she has let herself down to get better, because at present, I honestly believe she is one very angry person, because of PTSD. She wants to be a better person, but is still lost within the clouds of PTSD to achieve what is best for her, not what is best for me.
 
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I didn't get angry...I am just sad.... for her. I'm sorry you had to go through that Anthony.
 
I'm sorry too Nam... Thanks for your support. I have high aspirations to help people because I actually care about what is happening with PTSD, and how such misinformation gets thrown around at us all, and to try and save people some of this extra stress and trauma, really can aid in their recovery process. Not for this woman though... as she still has way too much anger to get out, and she doesn't seem to care who she takes it out upon... uncontrolled PTSD! She will find support that suits her, and hopefully might come to terms one day that she wasn't the nicest of person, and be able to admit it to herself. I know I wasn't when my PTSD was in full flight, and I regret so many things I have done... but its still a little sad to have it inflicted upon me when I am trying to help, instead being judged by this person.
 
Nam said:
I didn't get angry...I am just sad.... for her.

Not me... reading that made me mad!

No one is forcing her to look at the logo,
she is free leave the forum at any time.
If something is bothering her to the point where she can't take seeing a cartoon image...
well then she probally needs ALOT more help then anyone here can give her through a forum...
especially to go to the point of insulting the creator of this site just 'cause she had a bad day.

Never pick shit with a PTSD'er
 
Well. Everyone is entitled to their opinion. However wrong they are! You should send her the number of a good shrink Anthony! Maybe the forum has just hit too close to home?
 
Yer, I think she does really need help soon, which is the sad ironic part of it all. I and the logo offended her to go elsewhere, which is great as long as she is getting the help and support she needs, and not just being told everything is ok and having people agree with her, which I got the impression is what she wants, or is used too. It just can't happen with PTSD.

I really feel a bit hurt by her statements, but then I got a very positive email last night from the recent press release from this site, from a doctor who is interested in this cause very much, which helped me past this angry little women's statements a bit. Normally I am really not the sort of person who gets bothered by these type things, but this one kinda hit me a bit harsh, and shocked me I think at most.

I have lived things, experienced things and have educated myself on most thing PTSD because of my illness, and knew that so many people are wandering around in the dark out there as I was, looking for someone to just tell me which direction to start looking, or someone to say "hey, I know what your talking about" and actually mean it. I knew that this community needed to be built to help others hopefully go through something a little easier than I did, and that is what kicked me a bit I think.

Too many people get judgemental about alterior motives, and this and that these days, and never just can accept easily that some people are out for nothing more than to just help others suffer a little less than they have, or help them get through something that little support or education exists for. This community has no alterior motives too it, just to help one another and hopefully ease peoples suffering a little less than without help.

The way I see this community, is that there is no heirachy as such, because thats not what works in the best interest of a community such as this. What this community does is allow people to come and vent, grief, look for support, direction if they want it, but more importantly, you will get people who directly relate to one another from similar circumstances, and then people start their own threads where only one or two may be involved, because it is directly related to them, but still allows scope for everyone else to relate and even put suggestions in if they think it could help.

Whilst I created this community, I am most certainly not the owner of it as such, as the forum is owned now by every member and reader off it, I just manage it as such, and edit any wrong doings such as spam, or illegal activity that may get posted... that is my role, and I limit it too that. I like to think that this forum actually is owned by all who contribute too it now, hence why I ask certain things before even I do them, because if its not in the best interest of the community, then I wouldn't do it.

Its things like this that go through my head, that kick me in the guts from email such as what this woman sends. If she asked me about the logo, instead of telling me she does understand what it stands for, and making dicatative requests as though I had done something wrong, or owed her something, then I most likely would have changed it, but the fashion of dictation was what stopped me even thinking about putting the question to the public on her behalf, to see what others thought, as I had never really thought about her instance in that light, and am always open to listen, but just don't like being threatened, or dictated to how I must manage, control or run this board, because of the exact reasons stated above, things should be discussed with members who I see as the actual part owners in this community, because it is members that makes places like this worthwhile informative communities, not individuals such as myself. I just established it, but everyone else has actually built this place as such.

I guess some people with PTSD just don't see past themselves even in the slightest.
 
Hi Anthony,
This is just too sad for words. MW is in a really bad place at the moment. She is hurting and really needs the forums help and support and she will if she asks for it.

I agree her approach is a little abrupt and unseasonable but I do believe that it is still a cry for help.

I recognize MW attitude in my own attitude 12 months ago.

Everyone I spoke to and everything everyone did annoyed and p***ed me off and I found fault with everything and everyone.

I feel that once she receives some profession help she will find that the world will be a better place.

I feel that we should see this for what it really is, a cry for help.

Don’t take it personally Anthony.

Socks.
 
anthony said:
I guess some people with PTSD just don't see past themselves even in the slightest.

Aaaaah if only you guys could have known this husband of mine in full PTSD flight. Someone who is near and dear to both our hearts once said to me in reference to Anthony, that 'his pride is so big he can't get out of his own way'. This, my loves, is definately progress. Not only is this progress but I have to agree that his response to the fan mail was more restraint than Anthony used to have. Previously, this person would have received an email straight away, definately not polite and straight to the point.
 
Kerrie-Ann,
Yeah, I think I'm still at that point, lol
MW would have gotten quite the nasty email back from me.
The more I think of it... she obviously needs the help...
if she were to join the community now (after taking back what she said of course)
I'd welcome her...

I'm so glad that you and Anthony have gotten this far!
It really provides alot of hope for the rest of us
 
well i too stumbled into this forum and i am not a veteran. yet have ptsd and have suffered many tragedy's and all forms of abuse...the first dead body i saw was beaten to death i was 6...not going there
i came to this forum and was greeted with open arms...i have felt comfortable and recieved a reply to concerns and not just a reply but explanation and other support systems to help me cope even just being told its part of the ptsd and normal i am not insane
so anthony keep doing wat u r doing
cause i have gained more in my recovery since being here then my doc could do in 10 years...
 
Thanks all for your support. Isn't my wife just lovely... giving away all my past experiences. Nothing is secret round here... LOL!

Socks, I would also welcome her, because it is a cry for help, and I had another conversation with her that isn't here for more personal reasons, and at the end of the day, she is still angry at the world, but I just reinforced to her that as long as she is getting help from somewhere, then that is all that matters to me, because she needs it.

It is everyone's contribution here that makes this place what it is, and growing daily. Advice and our experiences from each person, gives another somewhere something to relate too, something to confirm that their not insane, and hopefully someone just to chat with. I try and provide information that I have, experience and dealings with my involvement thus far with PTSD, but finding the time is sometimes an issue. I still have so much information to post here... yet little time to achieve it all.

Thanks to everyone for your support, and honestly, everyone here should thank themselves for their own involvement, and willingness to get help, and help others, even if you don't realise that help your giving, just being here and providing your issues, resolutions and experience is helping others.
 
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