Well success stories are not endings.. they are beginnings and middles too.
This is my beginnings.
I was afraid of being a mom. I thought I would either turn out like my mother or end up being a "horrible" mother, which I was always told I would be. I had my first son when I was 18. Within six months my mother had managed to take him and give him to his dad on the idea that I was a "bad" mom. Part of me believed her. I always degraded myself over this.
I had my second son when I was 21. My mother tried to get him when he was two and it failed badly. Matt has been with me the whole time. As he got older, I noticed how many compliments I got. He's so polite, he's such a good kid, he's so loving, he's so sensitive to others. Then people started telling me I was a great mom. I am a great mom! I have my moments that I've lost the darn manual but I do my absolute best that I can. I learn, I ask questions and I will fight for my kids. I will do what needs to be done so that they can grow up healthy and happy.
I learned that I am sooo capable of being a good mother and that I am a good mother. All it took was learning and attempting. I had the will and backed it up with action!
That's my beginning to motherhood. Now here's my beginning to my heart.
I swore, up and down, that I was not capable of loving another person in an intimate relationship. I thought I was just too screwed up. I always kept a piece of me hidden, for safe keeping. I just seemed to be incapable of giving myself to another at a heart felt degree.
Although my last relationship is currently over and it had many issues, I learned a very important thing from it. I can love. I can give my heart to someone! I did give him my heart and I loved him whole heartedly. I still had and have some trust issues, but I've learned those take time and hard work. There is no magic wand that makes it all better. In fact, I still love him. It's a wonderful feeling. Maybe everything didn't work out according to plan.. but I loved and I loved completely! I couldn't ask for more than that!
So that is my success story so far. My beginnings. I'm looking forward to being able to add more. And I will, the more I heal and grow, the more I work on.. the more success I will have.
bec
This is my beginnings.
I was afraid of being a mom. I thought I would either turn out like my mother or end up being a "horrible" mother, which I was always told I would be. I had my first son when I was 18. Within six months my mother had managed to take him and give him to his dad on the idea that I was a "bad" mom. Part of me believed her. I always degraded myself over this.
I had my second son when I was 21. My mother tried to get him when he was two and it failed badly. Matt has been with me the whole time. As he got older, I noticed how many compliments I got. He's so polite, he's such a good kid, he's so loving, he's so sensitive to others. Then people started telling me I was a great mom. I am a great mom! I have my moments that I've lost the darn manual but I do my absolute best that I can. I learn, I ask questions and I will fight for my kids. I will do what needs to be done so that they can grow up healthy and happy.
I learned that I am sooo capable of being a good mother and that I am a good mother. All it took was learning and attempting. I had the will and backed it up with action!
That's my beginning to motherhood. Now here's my beginning to my heart.
I swore, up and down, that I was not capable of loving another person in an intimate relationship. I thought I was just too screwed up. I always kept a piece of me hidden, for safe keeping. I just seemed to be incapable of giving myself to another at a heart felt degree.
Although my last relationship is currently over and it had many issues, I learned a very important thing from it. I can love. I can give my heart to someone! I did give him my heart and I loved him whole heartedly. I still had and have some trust issues, but I've learned those take time and hard work. There is no magic wand that makes it all better. In fact, I still love him. It's a wonderful feeling. Maybe everything didn't work out according to plan.. but I loved and I loved completely! I couldn't ask for more than that!
So that is my success story so far. My beginnings. I'm looking forward to being able to add more. And I will, the more I heal and grow, the more I work on.. the more success I will have.
bec