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Childhood sexual abuse: victims, perpetrators, survivors

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anthony

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The social malady of childhood sexual abuse has several components: the victims themselves, the perpetrators, and the victims as grown adults. As groups, what do these people look like? What are their basic characteristics? What is the minimum that a person should know about seeking help?

Victims of childhood sexual trauma span all socioeconomic strata, racial groups, and educational levels. At the same time, this social disease encompasses (by definition) children from birth through puberty. Experts point out that pedophilia almost always stops during a victim’s teens, but can last through adulthood.

While slightly more girls than boys are affected, somewhere around 30% of all children will experience some form of sexual trauma during their lives. In short, the face of a victim has no reliable demographic, no telltale characteristic, hair color, height, weight, or skin color. Perhaps the only thing they have in common is that they are children.

Who are the perpetrators? Who are the abusers? What is the typical face of this evil? Researchers and law enforcement sources report that perpetrators are overwhelmingly males from mid-adulthood to middle age, who have access to the young victim either sporadically or continually. They usually hurt more than one victim, or one victim several times. Typically, they are casual users of alcohol or recreational drugs, but rarely are out-of-control addicts. Many have had run-ins with the law, but have not served jail time. In more than 90% of all reported cases, the victim and the perpetrator know each other well or are related.

As with so many aspects of this social tragedy, reliable data are hard to find, mainly because so few cases ever get reported at all. Law enforcement authorities, rape crisis centers, hospitals, and advocacy groups all cite different statistics. It is safe to say that the problem is at least 5 to 10 times what reported statistics show.

Yes, there is light at the end of this long, dark road. The overwhelming majority of abuse victims survive, and go on to lead fulfilling, rewarding lives. This does not mean there is no pain, or residual emotional scarring. For sure, adult survivors experience a variety of psychological disorders including amnesia, nightmares, difficult relationships, and post-traumatic stress.

Psychologists say that the lingering trauma from childhood sex abuse is on a par with that suffered by war veterans, perhaps worse. What’s more, while many emotional challenges remain dormant without treatment, the typical abuse victim can become more debilitated in the absence of professional help.

Whether one is a survivor of childhood abuse, the loved one of a victim, a neighbor, friend, or coworker, there is help. Keep in mind that state laws concerning abuse vary widely, and each region has its own reporting mechanisms and social support systems. In the United States, one of the best “first resources” is the National Domestic Violence/Abuse Hotline. This umbrella organization can direct anyone to the most relevant resources in their local area, contact law enforcement if necessary, and provide numerous other types of support.
 
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In more than 90% of all reported cases, the victim and the perpetrator know each other well or are related.
I was shocked at this statistic. But I should not have been. We are all taught to beware of strangers from a very young age. I don't know any child who has been told to beware fathers, favourite uncles or the village priest. It is the familiar adult that has access to the children, often unsupervised and then is able to undertake such evil.
 
I would like to add that sometimes us the victims can also become the perpetrators and sometimes because we became the perpetrators we seek help cause deep down our natural state we are not really what we were made to by our own parents/siblings or others whom we believed were loved ones.

I think one of the biggest and most painful and maybe the biggest barrier is recognizing we turned to become the person who hurt us. It is very hard to start differentiating from that person and try to find who we truly are.
 
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