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Deleted member 47099
Does codependency ring any bells? Ever wondered what exactly codependent tendencies are? :)
Well, after an initial discussion the other day, @PreciousChild and I found that codependent tendencies are a very interesting and tricky thing - and something worth exploring and outgrowing.
We started talking about it here:
I'm dysfunctionally helpful and don't know how to stop
and would love to discuss the topic with others.
It's quite difficult to grasp "what is codependency" given that we are raised to believe that "helping is good" - so what could possibly be wrong or dysfunctional about helping...??
A good website to get some basic info on codependency is the CoDA.org website (co-dependents anonymous).
@PreciousChild and I also bought the book "Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself" by Melody Beattie and we'll both be referring to that occasionally too and discussing the points raised in the book. (It's available pretty cheap 2nd hand on Amazon etc.)
I'm not sure the title with its reference to "controlling" people is easily understandable and maybe not helpful. While a deeper analysis may reveal that "helping someone to get/ be better" is a very subtle way of controlling their behaviour (trying to make it go from "negative" to "positive") this is probably one of the trickier aspects of codependency and certainly not an obvious aspect that resonates immediately.
Both supporters and peeps with PTSD may find codependency a relevant issue and any input would be really welcome.
Please keep it positive and all about learning and understanding. :)
Well, after an initial discussion the other day, @PreciousChild and I found that codependent tendencies are a very interesting and tricky thing - and something worth exploring and outgrowing.
We started talking about it here:
I'm dysfunctionally helpful and don't know how to stop
and would love to discuss the topic with others.
It's quite difficult to grasp "what is codependency" given that we are raised to believe that "helping is good" - so what could possibly be wrong or dysfunctional about helping...??
A good website to get some basic info on codependency is the CoDA.org website (co-dependents anonymous).
@PreciousChild and I also bought the book "Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself" by Melody Beattie and we'll both be referring to that occasionally too and discussing the points raised in the book. (It's available pretty cheap 2nd hand on Amazon etc.)
I'm not sure the title with its reference to "controlling" people is easily understandable and maybe not helpful. While a deeper analysis may reveal that "helping someone to get/ be better" is a very subtle way of controlling their behaviour (trying to make it go from "negative" to "positive") this is probably one of the trickier aspects of codependency and certainly not an obvious aspect that resonates immediately.
Both supporters and peeps with PTSD may find codependency a relevant issue and any input would be really welcome.
Please keep it positive and all about learning and understanding. :)