Sufferer CPTSD Won't Own Me

smaija13

New Here
Hi Everyone. My given name is Susan. I am in the process of reading Pete Walker's Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving. It is from his book I found this site. I'm 50 years young and had a traumatic health event about this time last year that led me into a flashback and subsequent suicidal spiral. I have been in and out of therapy my whole adult life and have been diagnosed with myriad things, all of which never produced a lasting way to manage symptoms. It wasn't until I was in IOP earlier this year that I learned I have undiagnosed trauma/complex PTSD from many years of childhood sexual, verbal, physical abuse and neglect. I am thankful to finally have a diagnosis that feels relatable. I have spent many years trying to self-medicate with food and alcohol (have 19 years sober now but still sugar binge) and am hopeful that new therapy targeting CPTSD will provide some relief/results. Thank you for being here; I look forward to reading your stories and am certain some will resonate with me and help me to feel like I'm not alone. God Bless you on your healing journey!
 

Elizabeth 86

New Here
Hi Everyone. My given name is Susan. I am in the process of reading Pete Walker's Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving. It is from his book I found this site. I'm 50 years young and had a traumatic health event about this time last year that led me into a flashback and subsequent suicidal spiral. I have been in and out of therapy my whole adult life and have been diagnosed with myriad things, all of which never produced a lasting way to manage symptoms. It wasn't until I was in IOP earlier this year that I learned I have undiagnosed trauma/complex PTSD from many years of childhood sexual, verbal, physical abuse and neglect. I am thankful to finally have a diagnosis that feels relatable. I have spent many years trying to self-medicate with food and alcohol (have 19 years sober now but still sugar binge) and am hopeful that new therapy targeting CPTSD will provide some relief/results. Thank you for being here; I look forward to reading your stories and am certain some will resonate with me and help me to feel like I'm not alone. God Bless you on your healing journey!
Hi Susan! Welcome. I'm Liz, 35. I have read that book as well but never done any blogging..I think I felt some kind of need to keep my trauma history a secret. I've had childhood emotional trauma, sexual assault in college and many unhealthy relationships and drinking-related problems, before I figured out that CPTSD was the proximal cause of these issues. A big trigger was actually meeting my now husband. It was almost like I didn't know how to have a healthy relationship with someone who was a standup guy who loved me for me. I have the same issues around drinking/sugar binging.

You are not alone!!

My current therapist specializes in CPTSD but I haven't done EMDR yet since we can't meet in person due to covid. Having a trauma informed therapist helps a lot though. It's definitely a journey...
 
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