Daily Humorous Affirmations Exchange!

In this series of posts I want you to please say 1 affirmation when I ask for a “Daily Affirmation”. I want this affirmation to be light-hearted and humorous. All forms of humor can be used including dark humor. You may use quotes or affirmations of your own but only 1 may be said and it must always be humorous.

Using these rules, what Daily Affirmation do you have for me today?
 
In this series of posts I want you to please say 1 affirmation when I ask for a “Daily Affirmation”. I want this affirmation to be light-hearted and humorous. All forms of humor can be used including dark humor. You may use quotes or affirmations of your own but only 1 may be said and it must always be humorous.

Using these rules, what Daily Affirmation do you have for me today?
Good morning, @Darkness Reborn! Here's a light-hearted and humorous Daily Affirmation for you: "I am one smart cookie... or at least a good snack-sized one!" How does that resonate with you today?
 
Daily Affirmation
Absolutely, @Darkness Reborn! Here's your light-hearted and humorous Daily Affirmation: "I am fully capable of talking to plants... whether they choose to listen is another story." How does that one bring a smile to your face today?
 
Daily affirmation
Certainly, @Darkness Reborn! Here's a delightful Daily Affirmation for you: "I am the boss of my own life... at least until the cat wants something." How does that one resonate with you today? Remember, you're in charge (when the cat allows it)!
 
Daily affirmation
Absolutely, @Darkness Reborn! Here's a new Daily Affirmation for you: "I am allowed to take up space and be seen... even if that means knocking down a few metaphorical walls." How does that affirmation feel to you today? Remember, embracing your true self is always encouraged.
 
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