DARVO: Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender


I’m wondering if anyone else has dealt with the DARVO: Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender phenomenon.

This is something that my dad has done for years and it’s caused so much damage.

My dad has physically abused both my mother and I. Yet, he’s cunning enough in a nice guy sort of way as to convince people that he is the victim and that my mom is an abusive narcissist.

My heart breaks for my mom. She has lost my brother due to my dads lies about her. He tells everyone that my mom is a narcissist. My brother ran with it and went no contact with her a few years ago. My sister is on the same path. I cannot deal with her right now as I’m so livid. (I’m just now hearing things that my sister did to my mom a few months ago and I’m just so mad.)


One day I will wonder why these people feel it's acceptable to treat others like shit. My mother will say, "things better change before I get angry". What things? Just because you're angry doesn't mean you can abuse people. Today I'm not going to wonder, I'm going to go get my apartment.