Death Death of Cat

whiteraven

MyPTSD Pro
I don't know where else to put this, but I need to put it out there because I'm feeling sooo alone right now.

My older, 17yo cat died Saturday night. I wanted to avoid having her put to sleep for complicated reasons I'm not going to go into right now, but she was just so sick all that week (worse from a long struggle with a probably sinus or brain mass) - she was eating very little, was very weak, esp. in her back legs, would lie and stare, almost in a daze.

Saturday night she jumped off the couch and nearly fell because she was so unsteady, peed on the floor, and then just plopped down like she was exhausted. This had happened several times that week and I think I just realized how bad she was. She'd been struggling for a couple of weeks, on meds and fluids, seeing the vet every week. My vet was closed Saturday, but the emergency vet was open (I take my other cat to an internist there for her chemo) and so I took her there.

They were really good with her and with me and it was a very peaceful passing. I held her before, during, and after. And I made arrangements for a local organization that makes final arrangements for pets to pick her up.

Her absence creates this immense emptiness in my heart and my home. My other cat is here and very engaged with me, but I just feel so sad and lost.
 

Sideways

Sponsor
So sorry for your loss, especially of such a long term friend. There's no need for any internal conflict over choices made at the very end - she's now at peace now, no more pain, and you acted through love, caring and compassion.

I've had short funeral services for loved pets that I've lost in the past - as a way to help process and to relieve some of the grief. But also, because, in a way to acknowledge the significance of their contribution to my life. Never a formal a big formal affair, but it always felt appropriate. And in a way helpful. Marking the end of their time with me, and simultaneously celebrating and mourning that.

Be gentle with yourself. Hope you have some favourite pics that you can keep close until the grief passes.
 
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Teamwork

MyPTSD Pro
Just went through this June 5th with my beloved dog and the emptiness his loss has created is immense. People will give lots of tips but the turning points on the wheel of grief are highly individualistic, so just do you and call it grief, because it is. Sending comfort out of my own sense of loss and emptiness.
 

barefoot

MyPTSD Pro
So sorry for the loss of your special furry friend. They bring such joy into our lives and hearts (and we do them too, I believe)
But, gosh, the pain when they go...
 

Deanna

MyPTSD Pro
I've been through this with a two year old cat. She had a bad back and quit eating. My heart broke. Thinking if you and all the sweet times with your fur baby. I'm so sorry
 

osiris

MyPTSD Pro
@whiteraven
I’m so sorry about your cat. The pain of losing animals is unbearable.
You did right by her and loved her. She knew that and loved you right back.
No more we can ask for in life.

Sending gentle thoughts to help support you at this sad time.
 

whiteraven

MyPTSD Pro
Is there anything that would comfort you now, even while that emptiness and sadness and void are there?

My other cat, who I fully expected to go before this one, has been by my side constantly. I think I'm mostly doing ok - I bought a feline urn (which doesn't look anything remotely like an urn) and it's sitting on my bar right now. It kinda feels like she is still here. I found several short videos of her I had taken (including a couple of audios of her purring), which really made me happy. The hardest thing is that I can *feel* the emptiness she left behind.

You're a good carer / catmom, and done well by her.

Thank you. I think the relationship with my cats is pretty much the only thing I can honestly say I feel I've done right.

Be gentle with yourself. Hope you have some favourite pics that you can keep close until the grief passes.

Oh, they will be around until I'm gone. :-)

Just went through this June 5th with my beloved dog and the emptiness his loss has created is immense.

I am sososo sorry. I have a journal and a couple of books on pet loss, although I haven't been able to open any of them yet.

I am so, so sorry for your loss.

Thank you!

Deepest sympathy for your loss.

I have two special needs... one is still here and I didn't expect to make it to spring. It is hard to lose an animal companion. Dunno… it's like an "innocent"/simple souls relationship that you can't really have with human beings.

Yeah, I expected my other to be gone before now. No sense that my older was ready. She was pretty sick and I likely was just more caught up in treating her symptoms.

But, gosh, the pain when they go...

It is so intense. The love is just so pure.

My heart broke. Thinking if you and all the sweet times with your fur baby. I'm so sorry

Thanks. That's exactly how I feel - heartbroken.
 

Deanna

MyPTSD Pro
I still keep the canvas print ( 20"x16") of my first fur baby on my wall. We talk about her often. Her name was Ash and I just thought all cats were as sweet as her. The lady I got her from said she had an accident with her back. I wouldn't know what that would mean until two more years had passed. I guess.. Just be glad you got to be a part of her life as long as you did! Bless you! I'm so sorry we have to put these little babies down. ( it killed me after Ash died) but they can't take care of themselves. At least they don't have to suffer longer, with our way of being put to sleep.I know its hard. But we're thinking of you!
 
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