I can recognize a stranger jumping out of nowhere and attacking a person as being an aggressive act. But how can I know if someone I have a relationship with is being assertive or bullying/emotionally abusive? Like everyone, I make mistakes and sometimes other people rightfully feel angry/disappointed with me. I do feel that sometimes people take advantage of my mistakes to lash out and upset me. I am not good at knowing when to tell if a contentious situation is healthy or when it is unhealthy. I guess in a nutshell I need to know the difference between assertive behaviors and aggressive ones.