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Fear of Falling - Haven't Been Out in Three Months

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Nemesis

New Here
I haven't gone out of the house, other than to get food and stuff, see my psychiatrist, in like three months. I'm afraid of running into someone I know. Does that happen to anyone else or just me?

- Mark
 
Basically, I'm becoming isolated. Isolation, for all its negative attributes, is the only place that I feel safe.

-Mark
 
Mark,

When my symptoms started last July, my world shrunk considerably in a very, very short amount of time. Like you, I felt safe at home because I didn't have to put on my 'game face' there like I did when went into the world. Hell, sometimes just because I had to go to work was the only reason I got out of bed, much less left the house. But becoming isolated becomes easier and easier over time.

If you want to expand your world, start with small steps. Alter/add to your daily routine. Even if it means going to the grocery store on a different day or time. Something small and simple. See how you do pushing your boundries...see how you feel. If you fall on your butt, wait a few days and try it again until it becomes easier for you and then move onto the next thing. Work at your pace, but keep going forward.

I've been working on expanding my smaller-than-I-like-it world. I started with stopping by the library to pick up a book I had on hold. I had gotten so used to going online to place a book on hold and sending one of my daughters to the library to pick it up for me. But I did it. And now I'm making myself do something every day. Even the smallest alteration to my daily agenda I consider a victory for myself.

BTW-registering here and starting to ask questions and get information was a very good step out of your isolated world. It took guts, which you obviously have.

Lisa
 
Hi Nemesis

I just had to respond to this post. I too say this but it is followed by, "I have nothing good to say" Well.I have to think of the good things. I also have trust issues and being in the public causes soo much anxiety. I have taught classrooms full of adults. I can't imagine being in front of a group now. So yes i definately do this, isolation can sometimes be safer but this coping mechanism is definately no fun.
 
I too have to make myself go out into the World, I work full-time and I have to hold meetings and work with people everyday, it is my job. I think medication has helped tremendously in that aspect. However, I tend to crash when I get home because I am working so hard at holding it all together during the day. Which means that work gets the best of me and my family has to settle for the lump on the couch.
 
Hello Mark, I know what you mean although I haven't experienced it to the same degree. I call it hibernating. Thats what it feels like to me. I go through phases of it. I think its partly feeling uncomfortable with yourself. What are you worried about if you did bump into someone you knew? What do you think they would say? I agree with Marlene, little outings are all progress. Its a bit like getting used to wearing a new coat. One you dont feel like you fit. It will get better if you work on it, little by little. Sometimes I think the friends and people I have met after my accident are more worthwhile friends because they have only ever known the new me and they still like me! Even if you are uncomfortable with who you are at the moment it doesn't mean everyone will judge you, new or old.

Claire
 
I relate too Mark. I am two months out of the hospital and seem to be getting more and more isolated. I don't want to see people. When I am out I act as if everything is okay to the point that I even confuse myself as to how much I hate being out. Don't know a solution other than I am trying to find projects that keep me moving.
Patty
 
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