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Message: <blockquote data-quote="CoolBreezeonahotday" data-source="post: 1788972" data-attributes="member: 1418">It's my understanding that the saying of not comparing one's insides to other's outsides refers to pre-assuming if their life looks easy, rosy and without issue it isn't necessarily.. (Just a thought). A great example is many comedians, who in reality struggle with or sucumb to depression, SI and trauma(s).I don't think anyone goes looking for challenges, yet everyone has 'something'. I also wouldn't characterize yourself as 'not sane' if you are in touch with reality, albeit struggling with trauma's after-effects. Nor is one's family the person's fault. Nor does it doom them to being a facsimile.I do feel that love is not something contrived, but neither can it truly be present without knowing someone, and that includes the gems as well as the faults. But to one person what is a negative to another it's a positive or neutral. FWIW, because no relationship is ever the same (the particular dyad makes it unique), being as healthy as you can be can better allow each person to be able to contribute more. But the relationship isn't a 'you' or 'me' it's a 'we'- what works best to nurture it and ideally both people. And helps each other to thrive or heal or grow. If people fall in love, work at remaining in love, communicate and are fundamentally a good fit and compatible that can go a long way. But also to be yourself. Because no point (really) not being genuine or how can you know if there is truth in it or not? If you are yourself, at least you will know who accepts (or likes, or loves, or prefers) it, or not.(JMHO).</blockquote>

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