Childhood Finding out I was sexually humiliated as a child by older kids

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Questioning

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Well. I was talking to my mom two hours ago, and she mentioned when I was talking about what may have caused my anxiety issues, that there mught be something that stems from my childhood. I got curious as to what se was talking about, and as soon as she mentioned the names of the children that had done this things started coming back to me. When I was five, there was a girl living next to me who was always bullying me. She also involved two boys, one of whom was around eight years old. Apparently I had asked my mom about my ”friend” that had a peepee put into her.. you know. A year later when the boys moved out I had told my mom it was actually me, not my friend. This girl orchestrated these scenarios where I would be naked and had to do something ”or else”.. i remember being naked in my front yard, my mom had once even seen this. So, my question is, how would be the best way to deal with this information. I am already going to a psychologist, but this is a topic that we have never discussed due to me not being able to pinpoint what happened. I am worried I will deal with this the wrong way and get even worse anxiety. I had always felt like something has been bothering me forever but I just cannot remember it. I have been feeling sick after hearing it, sorry if this post was a bit rambly.
 

Questioning

New Here
Just bring it up to your psychologist, they will be able to help you work through it.
Yeah, I guess that is all that I can do really.. thing is I will have a long break now because I am transferred to another place which might take 6 months to a year.. just concerned about what will happen in between with these new thoughts.

thank you for replying btw?
 
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pam4him

Confident
I agree with those who've responded already, talk to the therapist. From a psychology background and personal experience, holding this kind of stuff in can eat at you from the inside out. You have a safe place to work through this and I strongly encourage you to use it. You can be guided in processing, coping skills and moving forward. Prayers for peace and strength.
 

DharmaGirl

MyPTSD Pro
I had the same thing happen to me when I was 6. I was seeing a trauma therapist and talked it out with him. I didn't remember any of my trauma either until my mom reminded me of a specific incident and it all started coming back.
 

Questioning

New Here
Ohh, that is really similar to my story too then. What age were you when you found out if I may ask? And did you go specifically for this reason? If you don’t want to disclose that is totally fine. Thanks for replying?
 
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