Finis And Can't Finish Them, Now What?

[Ronin]

IDK how to ask this.

But brighter ideaS have it I should ask, instead of sit with things alone, so.

Q, how do I regulate Want to be finished with someone level of done?

As in these people aren't finished not leaving me alone as long as they're alive. Apparently.

I'm not planning on acting.
But I'm tired of how emotionless I feel about the whole thing.

Not their knife. They can find some other blade to fall on.

But how do I regulate *me*?
Not about anger, to be clear.
I would vent anger plain, if it were it.

More about reasoning if they're out they can't do jack shit, again, that I have difficulty with.

As in I can't find the proper counter why not. That would click & stick as enough of a reason.

That bitches don't rate is very true but also not grasping the level of done I am with them.

 

[blackemerald1]

how do I regulate Want to be finished with someone level of done?

As in these people aren't finished not leaving me alone as long as they're alive. Apparently.

I'm not planning on acting.
But I'm tired of how emotionless I feel about the whole thing

^Not sure if I understand. Will give it a go. Regulating oneself when there remains an ongoing threat? You don't want to take action against them, let them know you even worry, where you are or that you expect they will come for you one day when they feel so sh*ty about themselves that they hark backwards in time to the one that got away? Hmm.. Is this even warm?

I don't know. I'm living in a similar situation post DV. I talked about this with someone just recently. It had to do with disclosing where I was & how I am now. The risk was too great and I had to decline what would otherwise have been a very normal thing to do.

I got tired of waiting for the axe to fall. I tried running away, changing my name, living in strange places. None of it worked.

Be super careful, counter-surveillance becomes a way of life? Apart from acceptance that this is now the way to live. Idk.. :hug:

 

[Ronin]

:)

Yep, regulating self with ongoing threat was part of it - but it was more than that, regulating yourself when you're very sure, for a myriad of reasons, murder of that threat would be a solution to the issue... and when that just isn't, for other myriad of reasons, feasible.

Hence why I disclaimered specifically I don't plan to act - but am (again) at (or more like non) emotional spot that I miighta want to learn how to regulate better - as it will keep coming back to that one and takes out of me something I'd prefer it not take out of me.