Hi, I'm Holly and I'm not sure what to write. I quess i've had ptsd since 1985, when a well meaning therapist tried to get me out of the denial about my mother, by hypnosis. I cried for the next year. Ive been hospitalized for depression and drug use about 7 times since then. It wasn't till 2004 that I learned my problem was ptsd. I always thought that it only happened when I tried to get off nicotine (been off the drugs for 12 years), untill last month. I was looking through family pics and saw my grandfather and lost it. I have very little memory of first 13 years of my life. At 13 my father died and my mother got a new life with a man who didn't want me and she chose him over me.. We were close to my dads parents but that stopped, because when we went to visit a couple weeks after my dad died and my grandmother cried so my mom didn't go back. From 16 to 18 I lived in a trailer with 2 brothers and during first 3 months my uncle, grandmother and grandfather died. I was heavy into drugs by then and can't remember funerals. I also think there was sexual abuse at 6 years old. I have so many questions to ask all of you and can't wait to here back from you.