Cd, I had those kinds of flashbacks for a long time. My husband was so understanding and tried to understand what I was going through. He kept repeating the words.....this is love, this is love, this is love. Talk to your hub.
Man i've been dissociating for decades. when you have no ather way to deal with it or do'nt know what's going on the natural reaction seems to be to numb down and hope it all just goes away, but it just lurks in the backgrond eating away at you even if you do not realize it. Even if it does seem to help at the time, and it does for the short term, it will surface and bite you eventually or surface in ways that seem totally unrealated to your trauma i.e. social isolation and the sorts.
It's hard to deal with it the right way but there comes a time when you have to deal with it head on or it will slowly eat away at you and control your life the wrong way. Short term pain for long term gain sort of thing.