My "drug of choice" has been food. I ballooned up to 160kgs. I wanted to eat myself to death. And probably would have succeeded, had I not met my husband. Food is an easier drug because you have to eat to survive, but it is more socially accepted than alcohol or drugs. I would eat high fat foods all day. Everything had to come with a large serve of fries or something soaked in fat. Food soothed the pain, became my friend, cheered me up when I was depressed, calmed the stress and panic. It generally made me feel better about me.