And just like that after a almost a 4 year relationship. It’s done. Just got the news and with evidence that he’s seeing someone else. And already public in social media....of coarse. Even put its public and unblocks me fir me too see. And Just to think, one month ago he wanted to make it work because he knew everything we went through and everything he knew he made me go through; but that I never gave up on him and always had faith in him, because I loved him and accepted him unconditionally. That it would be a waste to give up on something so special and pure after all these years together. Little by little knowing the true him and the dark side of him also since day one. I just feel so betrayed simply because I gave my all in this relationship, and I really did feel it and I know he did too. He showed me the real loving pure him to me and my daughter and was always there fir us as a great spouse/father to us. It’s just like at least he could have had the courage to at least tell me “don’t wait for me like other times” “move on” or even if it would hurt me “I’m seeing someone else”...but to end it like this? I don’t even feel jealous right now. Im just feeling so betrayed and disrespected but eventhough everything I have been through with him, the wonderful and the bad days/moments I wish him the best. But that’s it. And I thank God simply because he came in my life to show me how it feels like to be loved and cared by a person and how capable I am of loving someone by doing everything by heart and the impossible also for a person. Of course I know someone else may come in my life and show me this feeling again, maybe even more or different; but it’s wonderful to know how LOVE feels. All I know is that one day he will realize and remember all the good and dark moments of his and when I ALWAYS stood there for him right my his side. This year 2018 started horrible. Last year was going bad to than hooes of getting married and starting a family again. Eventhough it was never settled. But it was by far the best year lf progress. I never liked the isolations (2 days, 2 weeks or 4 months at most) He would be one to do it all the time when he couldn’t hold himself anymore and I couldn’t do anything else but accept it and let him be. To than always come back with the, I need you, I really want this, I’m going to try my best, we can do this, I believe in me and us, you make me happy. Therapy, medications, hospitalization and all other ways just to make it work... But I always feared In this to happen. But this year was different. And it happened. Now I’m feeling all the weight of All the years before I held and lived, the ups and the downs, the anger, the panicking, the confusions, everything! Everything fallong right on top of me like a cold bucket of freezing water. Im trying my best to remember the good days, the true him, the adventures and road trips, the accomplishment together, the laughter and of all the love. And I try so hard and when I look at a photo of him or us, I seriously feel like I don’t know him anymore like a complete stranger. Never in my life has that happened to me. Amd I don’t doubt he really dis love me because he really did show it to me except the dark days. He was a completely other person. I wish him the best either way, but thats it. Nothing else. But all I ask myself is after everything why end it like this? At least for some respect he could have told me and not let me waiting like all the other times.
I just needed to get this out.
Thank you for all you supporters in everything you do and hang in there. We are really capable of loving so deeply a person unconditionally.
I just needed to get this out.
Thank you for all you supporters in everything you do and hang in there. We are really capable of loving so deeply a person unconditionally.