General Going away and need advice


New Here
Hi all,
I’ve been a member here for a while but never posted. I’m Nov last year my OH was a victim of a terror attack and since has suffered from quite severe ptsd. We’ve been through the works with it all; drink driving (being arrested for it), fighting, insomnia, drug abuse and so on. He’s in therapy (EMDR) and off work.
At the moment I’m struggling as he’s drinking again but only socially. However, three nights ago I ended up calling the police as I woke up at 3am to him stood outside having cut himself. He then ran off. This isn’t the first time either.
I have to go away for work next week for three nights for the first time in a while and I’m just so anxious about it all. What if I’m not here and he does something. I’m looking to have the convo with him tomorrow about removing all alcohol from the house and not having drinks with friends but unsure if this is right. But at the same time, I don’t want to spend my two nights away constantly worrying about him.
What are people’s similar experiences and/or advice on what to do?


but unsure if this is right.

There is never anything not right about trying to keep someone you love safe.

I am a sufferer and have never had the experience of having to deal with my difficult self and am sure in many ways you can get better advice from others but it sounds to me like maybe you could use more support for yourself as this is a hard situation to be in. I've been sober for a lot of years and I have known many people from Codependent's Anonymous and Al-Anon who were able to find some level of peace even in the thick of self-destructive behaviors from family members and other loved ones. There may be other mental health groups, too, of course.

It sounds like there are some seriously self-destructive behaviors happening here that are outside of your control. Of course you can and probably should voice your concerns but ultimately as I am sure you are aware, what happens after you leave may be left up to a stint of depression or bad memories.

I am sorry you are having to go through this. It must be very scary.
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