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Going to a Tori Amos Concert

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metis-siren

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So, I'm going to a Tori Amos Concert tomorrow and this is a big deal. Her music has been a part of my healing for almost a decade now. It's seen me through some very dark periods, some happy places, and the many in between. I actually bought waterproof mascara just for the occasion.

Oh, and I'm going to meet her. I'm nervous already. I know many people tend to be quite honest with her about what they've been through when they meet her. Because this is happening in a different city, and I'm going with a very close friend I am feeling a little safer about this whole process, but I still have some nervousness and anxiety.

I don't know how you put a face to music which has been a part of your sonic healing, a part of your own story. That place where music allows you to feel whatever it is that you need to feel, and sometimes takes you to a place you didn't know you could go - and allows you to take that leap. The comfort of music, but also where it pushes your boundaries in a positive way.

I suppose this is most difficult for me to explain because when I was 15 and pretty much couch-surfing at relatives, I was also diagnosed with PTSD and had been diagnosed as being clinically depressed for a couple years by then. It was the crisis stage of my healing, and I could not conceive of what I was going to do, how I was going to get through it. I wanted desperately to know someone else had gotten through it and gone on in life to use their experiences to help people. To live life, instead of enduring it. Her music and her story was what got me through some extremely rough periods.

How do you say thank you to someone for allowing their experiences to become so public and in turn giving you that extra push you needed when you didn't feel you could do it for one more day? Thank you just doesn't seem enough.

I have been told I will pretty much cry the entire time I meet her, and through the concert, as most others tend to. So, here's to tears, sonic healing and being thankful for the honesty of others pain.

Many Blessings,

A. Lauren
 
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