Has anyone ever "seen"...? Visual Flashbacks

GreySouled

Learning
Has anyone ever experienced "seeing" a p***s that isn't there? I'll give two examples:

One was a few years ago, I was at my place of worship and, turning my head to the left, noticed an older man going into the restroom out in the lobby. I remember thinking: "Eww, now I'm picturing him in the bathroom." I turned my head back to focus on the speaker straight ahead and "saw" a boner, clear as day, to the right of my face. I ducked my head away from it and thought: "No, I can't do that here!", as if responding to a request. (For reference, I've never "done that" or anything remotely "that" ever with anyone... oh wait, except for at some point in childhood, apparently).

Then this past Thursday, after my T session which was "eventful" (introduced to new IFS part and just some things that came up or that I felt afraid to let come up... I got confused at one point because my Little One thinks she's 3 or 4ish, but this info points to 7. Anyway, not to get into that... only to say that it was a session that rattled my whole nervous system). So, afterward, I pick up my kid and we run a few errands. Upon parking, turning off the ignition, and reaching over to the passenger seat to get my mask out of my purse, when I sit back upright I glance back down in my lap and see clear as day a frigging p***s between my legs, pointed at me, you know... I kind of gasped, shook my head and said out loud: "See, this is what I'm talking about." (A rebuttal in my ongoing imaginary conversation to naysayers who'd rather believe I'm making this all up). I mean, the detail, coloration, it was just too real, especially to never have seen one up close before, you know?

All this to ask, because I don't think I've ever come upon an experience where someone is FBing or seeing just a bodyless p***s, if anyone has dealt with this... Yes, I'll bring this up with T next time, but I always feel more validated when I know someone else has experienced the same, makes me feel less crazy.
 

GreySouled

Learning
OK yes, I've definitely had a few full immersion blips FB out of nowhere, definitely pain, sometimes auditory as I'm falling asleep. But a superimposed bodiless... hoojibob? I had to ask.
 

arfie

MyPTSD Pro
disembodied body parts are not normal-for-me, but sensory hallucinations are quite normal-for-me. in my case, i think those hallucinations go beyond ptsd flashbacks. proof unavailable, but i believe i "think" with my senses, then translate that sensory data to spoken language. i'm multi-lingual, so i can translate to more than one spoken language. intrusive thoughts are as common in my sensory language as my spoken language. just believing. . . i wouldn't attempt to defend the theory in public.

gentle support while you form your own theories, grey.
 

shimmerz

MyPTSD Pro
Maybe if it happens again, use another sense for verification. It may stop the flashback if you negate the experience with attempting to touch it and your brain realizes it can't be touched. Kind of like a mirror box Norman Doidge) approach to it.
 

coraxxx

Policy Enforcement
Visual flashbacks for me typically won't really mingle with reality, it would more superimpose over my view. I can see something that visually evokes it than it will overlay, but in general it's the same images over and over and over again, more or less coupled with sound or feelings. Feelings can blend more with current feelings and cause confusion, but I never experienced having a single near hallucinatory thing popping up inside of the normal field of vision, it's always more "global" and on another dimension (that comes behind or before the actual one, but that is mostly separated).

I can eyeball things if I have a very short glimpse, but it wouldn't be so strong.
 

prynne

MyPTSD Pro
My visual flashbacks are typically similar to what @coraxxx described, semi-transparent visuals on top of real life, opaque with my other senses involved if I'm really far gone. The one exception is when I see someone who has facial features that are vaguely similar to one of my abusers. It's like for a split-second I swear it's them, that's their face, and then it's gone, replaced with the person's actual face. So no penises, but yes I have seen one single thing as a flashback/hallucination (?I'm not sure what to call this)
 

Freddyt

MyPTSD Pro
Since I had no visual input during my first trauma I never thought of it as replay but the more hard thought I give it the more I realize that it replays in more of a sensory replay way. Those set of feelings associated with a head injury and the bodies reaction to it....
 

Freddyt

MyPTSD Pro
Why is it threads here always leas to discoveries of things that, in the 45 years since my first incident have become so freaking normal that dissociated and unable to snap the puzzle pieces together is my normal......

They are flashbacks - by definition. There was no visual to go with them so....it was just a weird thing that happened.....a set of sensations, no sound no visual...

Oh goody, more stuff for therapy......
 

Weemie

MyPTSD Pro
I have a brain injury that interferes with iconic memory processing but I do get flashes of things that were encoded in my mind in what I assume is prior to my injury, because either I have images of them or I just know How they look like and those get very suddenly dropped on me like getting water up your nose. Or hit in the mouth. Sudden and retching and uncomfortable. And painful.

Sometimes I see things out of the corner of my eye. Shadows. Or I see something and mistake it for something else. Hear foots. Gunshots. Screaming. Dogs barking. Feel bugs on my body. Hands on my body. Tickling. Gasping. Get stuck in memories and I can't pull myself back and the outside world vanishes on a pinpoint. Tunnel vision. Feel like my body is contorted in bad shapes. Stabs of sensation in private places.

Can't breathe. Suffocating. Heavy fabric on my mouth and head. Some of it is memories and some is happening again. Feel see hear taste smell. Feel the sensations in my throat from swallowing. Bad stuff. Happens a lot. Makes me cry. Makes me empty. Dunno what else. Sorry if that's too much.
 
S

Sarah12345

I have a brain injury that interferes with iconic memory processing but I do get flashes of things that were encoded in my mind in what I assume is prior to my injury, because either I have images of them or I just know How they look like and those get very suddenly dropped on me like getting water up your nose. Or hit in the mouth. Sudden and retching and uncomfortable. And painful.

Sometimes I see things out of the corner of my eye. Shadows. Or I see something and mistake it for something else. Hear foots. Gunshots. Screaming. Dogs barking. Feel bugs on my body. Hands on my body. Tickling. Gasping. Get stuck in memories and I can't pull myself back and the outside world vanishes on a pinpoint. Tunnel vision. Feel like my body is contorted in bad shapes. Stabs of sensation in private places.

Can't breathe. Suffocating. Heavy fabric on my mouth and head. Some of it is memories and some is happening again. Feel see hear taste smell. Feel the sensations in my throat from swallowing. Bad stuff. Happens a lot. Makes me cry. Makes me empty. Dunno what else. Sorry if that's too much.
Wow,I can definitely relate fo alot of stuff you mentioned. This is my first time on a PTSD post/thread and this is very helpful to know it's not just me and I'm not alone in all this despite the scenerios...Feelings and flashbacks etc I share in common plus more, ty for your post. Hope things get easier for you!
 
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