Having good dreams about ex husband

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Gs172003

MyPTSD Pro
What the crap?

I don't normally dream about him at all ( not that I can remember) my nightmares when I have them usually involve my kids. Lately I have been having good dreams about my ex like we are in this fun loving relationship and he's incredibly sweet. My last one I had like that I spent a day thinking how great everything was because I couldn't be right about how bad he was because of that stupid dream. Why would I start dreaming about him now and why the hell would it be good?
 

Innordinate

MyPTSD Pro
Dreams are stupid and meaningless.
Just your brain getting rid of unwanted crap it doesn't need to store. You've probably had a bunch of dreams about him you can't remember. Try not to put much thought into it because it could increase the amount of dreams you have about him for a bit- at least that's what i find happens.

but yeh, sorry you're having them. I get the same thing about one of my abusers randomly ? off and on in spurts. the theory people here have come up with is that my brain made/needs a bonding connection- even if it's a totally screwed up one, so it randomly comes back to my abuser and the mind control crap he used on me to make that totally messed up bond.

it is so friking confusing and disturbing and disgusting .....

but- just a stupid dream. dreams are inherently ridiculous. dreaming about your ex as if you were in a happy relationship is just as ridiculous as the nightmares of your kids is just as ridiculous as a dream that you're riding unicorns across rainbow bridges etc.

no truth to them. nothing prophetic. just ridiculousness.

if your brain is the bodies computer- dreaming is just it's way of doing a cleanup/defrag and making space for new sensory inputs/programs.

hope some of that makes sense and helps.
 

Gs172003

MyPTSD Pro
Dreams are stupid and meaningless.
Just your brain getting rid of unwanted crap it doesn't need to store. You've probably had a bunch of dreams about him you can't remember. Try not to put much thought into it because it could increase the amount of dreams you have about him for a bit- at least that's what i find happens.

but yeh, sorry you're having them. I get the same thing about one of my abusers randomly ? off and on in spurts. the theory people here have come up with is that my brain made/needs a bonding connection- even if it's a totally screwed up one, so it randomly comes back to my abuser and the mind control crap he used on me to make that totally messed up bond.

it is so friking confusing and disturbing and disgusting .....

but- just a stupid dream. dreams are inherently ridiculous. dreaming about your ex as if you were in a happy relationship is just as ridiculous as the nightmares of your kids is just as ridiculous as a dream that you're riding unicorns across rainbow bridges etc.

no truth to them. nothing prophetic. just ridiculousness.

if your brain is the bodies computer- dreaming is just it's way of doing a cleanup/defrag and making space for new sensory inputs/programs.

hope some of that makes sense and helps.
Thank you.

The problem is he is the part of my mess that my brain chose to forget. I remember everything in that part of my life..but just fragments of him and what he did. I don't want to have this crap come piling back all of a sudden.

I don't know if I made sense or not. Thing is not only am I scared of what might be about to happen but the timing is terrible. The anniversary of my cousin's suicide is coming up in August, my therapist is out of town for three weeks and I don't know if I can handle this crap. So anything you all can help me with would be great.
 

Innordinate

MyPTSD Pro
I don't know if I made sense or not
i think you made sense.
Thing is not only am I scared of what might be about to happen
what might be about to happen and how is related to your dream?
the timing
the timing might be why you're having the dreams.... stress, triggers of/from other things bringing up forgotten memories of your ex that your brain is trying to get rid of or make sense of again?

common thing ive read everywhere on this forum is that these things come up st seemingly the worst time but usually because you're ready to deal with them..

could be that?
 

Gs172003

MyPTSD Pro
i think you made sense.

what might be about to happen and how is related to your dream?

the timing might be why you're having the dreams.... stress, triggers of/from other things bringing up forgotten memories of your ex that your brain is trying to get rid of or make sense of again?

common thing ive read everywhere on this forum is that these things come up st seemingly the worst time but usually because you're ready to deal with them..

could be that?
Not sure but it could be

I know my oldest daughter is dealing with stuff from the same man and has been asking me questions. To think I'm having good things going on about him after all he's done makes me feel like shit.
 

Innordinate

MyPTSD Pro
oldest daughter is dealing with stuff from the same man and has been asking me questions.
well i think you just found why your dreaming about him.
why it's nice dreams..... no idea. but its NOT a prediction of anything that could happen in the future.

after all he's done makes me feel like shit.

yeh. makes sense and super sucks. again- sorry you're going through it.
 

Gs172003

MyPTSD Pro
well i think you just found why your dreaming about him.
why it's nice dreams..... no idea. but its NOT a prediction of anything that could happen in the future.



yeh. makes sense and super sucks. again- sorry you're going through it.
I definitely don't think it has anything to do with the future. But it feels like I'm confusion what happened in the past. Like it wasn't actually bad, that it was actually decent and I'm just a lunatic.
 

TruthSeeker

MyPTSD Pro
My immediate reaction to + dreams about X husband = So so very disgusting (very abusive the first time and the sex wasn't to dream or worthy of girl gossip)....oh, yeah.......and now he's crept back in my life in my subconscious....yuk. That would rock my boat like it has yours...I drew my trauma....but if you did that, you might start dreaming the truth. Wow...don't know what to say....good luck, there.
 

Friday

Moderator
:wtf: I hate those dreams. Although they’re better than the alternative.

...I figure if my brain HAS to be thinking of that c*nt? At least it’s doing me the favour of not sending me the dreams that mean I have to decide not to kill him in the morning when I wake up. I can just throw up and be done with it.
 
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