Woundedhealer
Learning
Hello everyone
Yes I’m brand new but have been binge reading all of the threads for the past few weeks. Everyone’s posts have saved my life and I am very grateful!
I’ll try to keep this as short as possible.
I met my love 11 months ago. He is a paramedic who recently divorced after a gruelling custody battle over his children and has lost his daughter as she refuses to see him.
We were on and off for the first 6 months. We always remained in contact as I was very understanding of his troubles and new he was having a difficult time.
But then in May ( after 8 months of hot and cold) he came on strong and said he loved me, wanted to grow old with me, thanked me for my patience and understanding and we bonded intensely.
Our children hit it off and we had plans to build a future together.
We then spent a glorious week in Cuba where we were madly in love. Although I started to notice strange behaviour like waking up to find him asleep on the bathroom floor and his need to escape crowded rooms and run to our hotel room saying he didn’t feel well.
When we got home ... he started to distance again. At first I was a loon ... texting him asking him what the heck was happening? He’d say he was busy which made me like I wasn’t a priority.
I started giving ultimatums and he stopped answering. Then one day we bumped into each other at the park ... he wouldn’t make eye contact, touch me, he could barely talk and I left devastated thinking he had used me for the trip.
But then it clicked! So I texted and said do you have PTSD? I’ll love you no matter the answer
He responded yes,,, for many traumas
Then radio silence for 3 days
When he finally texted he said he didn’t have it in him for a serious relationship, that he was broken and lost, that I am amazing and I deserve more and he has to focus on his self care and is in therapy
This whole situation rattled me to my core! I was absolutely devastated but thanks to you all , I know I have to let him go. I wrote him a letter saying I’d be here when he’s ready
This has made me confront my own issues
I now need to focus on self care... I have a therapy session booked.
I love him ... feel he’s my forever person but I have to let him go
I hope he comes back!
Thanks for reading! And I welcome any words of wisdom or insight from sufferers and supporters!
Kind regards
Deana
Yes I’m brand new but have been binge reading all of the threads for the past few weeks. Everyone’s posts have saved my life and I am very grateful!
I’ll try to keep this as short as possible.
I met my love 11 months ago. He is a paramedic who recently divorced after a gruelling custody battle over his children and has lost his daughter as she refuses to see him.
We were on and off for the first 6 months. We always remained in contact as I was very understanding of his troubles and new he was having a difficult time.
But then in May ( after 8 months of hot and cold) he came on strong and said he loved me, wanted to grow old with me, thanked me for my patience and understanding and we bonded intensely.
Our children hit it off and we had plans to build a future together.
We then spent a glorious week in Cuba where we were madly in love. Although I started to notice strange behaviour like waking up to find him asleep on the bathroom floor and his need to escape crowded rooms and run to our hotel room saying he didn’t feel well.
When we got home ... he started to distance again. At first I was a loon ... texting him asking him what the heck was happening? He’d say he was busy which made me like I wasn’t a priority.
I started giving ultimatums and he stopped answering. Then one day we bumped into each other at the park ... he wouldn’t make eye contact, touch me, he could barely talk and I left devastated thinking he had used me for the trip.
But then it clicked! So I texted and said do you have PTSD? I’ll love you no matter the answer
He responded yes,,, for many traumas
Then radio silence for 3 days
When he finally texted he said he didn’t have it in him for a serious relationship, that he was broken and lost, that I am amazing and I deserve more and he has to focus on his self care and is in therapy
This whole situation rattled me to my core! I was absolutely devastated but thanks to you all , I know I have to let him go. I wrote him a letter saying I’d be here when he’s ready
This has made me confront my own issues
I now need to focus on self care... I have a therapy session booked.
I love him ... feel he’s my forever person but I have to let him go
I hope he comes back!
Thanks for reading! And I welcome any words of wisdom or insight from sufferers and supporters!
Kind regards
Deana