Though I'm not yet sure that I belong in here by diagnose, I don't have any. My situation contains emotional flashes with flight impulses or something like freeze responses. Specially in intimate or potentially intimate situations with people dear to me. So intimate connections have seldom occured and never lasted. At this time in life I'm stuck in avoidance. I trace this back to an always very sick mother that died when I was 10 and a depressed noncommunicative/introvert asthmatic, allthough on that level very reliable father. I also must say I'm very touched by many of the reports from Your lifes and the sincere support that is given here.