Here we go again...


Nightmares and vivid dreams coming round again. Had one the other night about being on a ship, in rank file, chanting then suddenly being pushed closer together. Close ranks. Protect against the threat. Protect the whole. Terrorists approaching. I'm on the edge of the group but then I'm not, I look and someone younger than me is now there. Fear, terror in her eyes. Physically smaller and weaker than me. Then the threat comes, knife in hand. Someone from the back of the group steps out to draw them away. It works. He throws the knife, it misses and I chose to wake up, terrified.
Then last night, another dream that my therapist died. I wasn't supposed to be at the funeral, but I was, somehow, but in a separate room. Her son came round to greet everyone. Somehow we all end up in the same room, looking up the hill to where she was burried. Then we are climbing the hill. Well, they are, her children. I was standing to one side, watching, but somehow still rising with them. They told me a story how her husband carried her up the steep hill when she couldn't walk up it. Of past family outings, of good times up the hill. I became friends with her children. Met another therapist but it felt like I was still speaking with the current one. Very confusing.

I hate dreams/nightmares, but I know now that they serve a purpose, not least to remind me that there is unfinished/unprocessed business to attend to.