How Do You Know Something Is A Problem?

[scout86]

My T asked that question yesterday. At first glance, I thought it was kind of a silly question. (He pretty much NEVER asks silly questions.) I also thought it would be easy to answer. The more I thought about it, the more it seemed like a pretty good question. I haven't given him my answer to that yet, but I thought it would be interesting to see what other people used for criteria.

So, any thoughts? How do YOU know something is "a problem"? What, exactly, makes something a problem?

 

[Anarchy]

My guess FWIW;

It's what you think is a problem.

the difficult bit comes when we have to interact with other people and what they do or say (or don't do or don't say) is considered a problem by us

or what we say, do or don't - is considered a problem by them (and they respond by not paying us, not speaking to us or get violent on us).

 

[Suzetig]

It's a really good question and one that I don't think I have the answer to. One of my difficulties is often not knowing something is a problem for me until after the event, usually while trying to figure out why I feel anxious, I comfortable or upset about a situation.

So, that might be part of the answer - I feel "off" in some way. At the moment I tend to ascribe that to me and the way I think about things but I'm slowly learning that my feelings come from somewhere and are generally trustworthy. So, if I feel off about something I try to figure out what it is that's got me feeling that way and why. Sometimes it's the situation and sometimes it's my own stuff but separating out what's mine and what isn't generally helps me figure out if something is a problem for me.

 

[Deleted member 29920]

When whatever it is, causes you great inconvenience.

 

[Tinyflame]

When it's causing grief, worry or distress, to myself or another. When it causes pain to another. When it causes me fear. When it harms myself or another.When it involves deceit, harm, abuse, manipulation, violence or justification of those. When it violates another's choices, rights, beliefs. peace, well-being or future, mind heart body or soul.

 

[Lionheart]

If it interferes with my life, especially on a regular basis it is a problem.
If it interferes with my ability to function well, it is a problem.
If it causes me undue grief or pain, it is a problem.
If it makes me uncomfortable and unhappy, it is a problem.
If I have difficulty letting go of something, it is a problem.
If it doesn't serve me well and/or goes against my nature, it is a problem.
If it has to do with math, or algebra it is a problem... LOL :laugh: I had to throw that in there. hahaha :D

I guess that just about covers it for me...unless it becomes a problem. ;)

 

[Ronin]

If it's a problem situation I don't have an idea or means of solutions, and need to solve.

Eventually, if it's a problem situation I have plenty of ideas to solve, but other factors about it undermine my capacity for solving it.

So basically if factors inducing helplessness or enough felt helplessness that it stops my ability to think & act, jump into the play.

 

[Truthful_Whispers]

That IS a stupid question. Sounds like he need to reboot some of his brain cells. :sour:

 

[lostforgottensoul]

How do YOU know something is "a problem"? What, exactly, makes something a problem?

When it starts to negatively affect your life whether its an addiction to anything and takes over all time, stops all hobbies, stops anything that you'd do for fun. When it takes over. When it makes you stop healing and growing and bettering your life. All of that is negatively affecting your life.

 

[anonymous]

I think it's a great question. I think I'm looking at it differently than some, though.

I can recognize problems easily, outside of the emotional ones. Otherwise I am clueless to an issue UNTIL something physical prevents itself. I mean that like I clench my jaw so bad I break teeth or sore muscles from being tense. Really a variety of things. Even then it takes me a while before I connect it to to ''a problem'

 

[Ellabella44]

when it is something that I feel the need to reach out to others.

otherwise all the above.

Especially the math @Lionheart777

 

[Chimera]

If it's a problem situation I don't have an idea or means of solutions, and need to solve.

Eventu...

This. Exactly.

I might add, that if it is something I cannot solve myself, and I have to seek outside assistance. That's a problem! (The isolationist in me cringes at needing to ask for help)

Et
But outside myself? I see problems with design, implementation, processes very easily and solutions come immediately to mind...also the ability to see solutions implemented...wish I could apply that to myself :bored: