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How do you mitigate when Dysregulated?

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Freddyt

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Lets just get to it. Had an incident this morning. Freaking cat screaming her head off this morning - for no apparent reason. 2 hours sleep.

Full on loose the plot and chase said cat around until I saw that look on my wife's face and realized what was going on.

Anger was really really dysregulated.

When you realize you are at that point, what do you do to pull it back?
 
I have to get someplace that I can be alone. If I'm at that point it sort of has to run it's coarse. If I'm by myself I can rant and vent, cry if I have to , I don't harm myself or anyone else. The trick is to start to learn when we are headed that direction and take steps to start to calm down. It takes self awareness, practice and having some things that you personally do to try and calm down before it gets crazy.

But if it's already in play, then I have to excuse myself, regardless of the situation and calm my ass down. And then try to remember what sent me down that road and spend some time with those feelings. Don't know if this helps, but I spent a lot of years being in that state. Talk with your T and see if they have any suggestions also.

Usually I have let things build up, things I am anxious or frustrated about and instead of talking it out, I act it out. I got tired of making amends for stupid behavior, (or getting banned here!!) and really had to make an effort to work on it.
 
Lets just get to it. Had an incident this morning. Freaking cat screaming her head off this morning - for no apparent reason. 2 hours sleep.

Full on loose the plot and chase said cat around until I saw that look on my wife's face and realized what was going on.

Anger was really really dysregulated.

When you realize you are at that point, what do you do to pull it back?
Ice cold shower gets the edge off for me. Or cold water on my wrists and in my face.
 
anger channeling. @MrMoonlight didn't call it, "anger channeling," but he described two excellent anger channels. i hadn't heard of the Styrofoam ice cups channel, but i might have to give that one a whirl. in an incident such as a rude awakening, often just letting my anger burst is enough to prevent escalation. in the case of ongoing stresses/irritations (tax season is upon us), i might need to do more systematic anger channeling, such as hitting the speed bag.
 
I found fairly recently that dancing can really help with dysregulation. I lock myself in a room then tune into music. Moving or shaking gently at first to ground myself, and then just letting my emotions lead my body. I used to be very tentative at it in the beginning, and felt embarrassed with myself, even when I'm doing it alone. But as I practice more often, I've been able to let go slowly and be more intuitive about it.

The time I tried it when I was in rage, it led to a really ugly, chaotic 'dance' (if you can call it that, as it probably looked more like an exorcism), while crying and growling loudly. It felt quite cathartic.
 
I walk out, and keep walking. My SUDS are up, so I need to bring them down. I walk out to bring an immediate stop to any dysregulated behaviour, then keep walking to force my body to regulate.

Later on, when I'm calmer, I need to go back and figure out why I was so angry (usually, the root cause wasn't whatever I got angry at, that was just the final straw) so I can come up with a solution.
 
So suggestions so far,

1. Rhythm and exercise/burning it off.
2. Channelling anger
3. Cold Water/shock.

I know at certain stages and certain levels of stress I can get to that dysregulation point faster. It also seems that in unguarded moments (like waking) emotions can flash to that level very quickly.
That's why I like multiple methods. When you can - pull it back. If not, get away, get rhythm, burn it out or shock it, and then go back and deal with whatever.
 
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