General How long? Is it normal to be in a triggered state for months?

throwaway13

Learning
Posted on here this summer when wife had her ptsd triggered. Seems like after months her symptoms are quieting down. Is it normal to be in a triggered state for months?
 

arfie

MyPTSD Pro
if there is a norm for my triggered states, i haven't noticed it yet. each round is unique, but i have gone through several rounds of prolonged triggered states. my early dx'es were from before the ptsd theories had come together, but i think i hear one or two of my shrinks making statements which could have translated to having been stuck in a quasi-permanent triggered state for years before i reached their doors. they called it, "a manic state," but that was the most accurate description available back then.

the good news is that with heightened awareness and psychotherapy tools, i can typically calm my trigger events far more efficiently these days.
 

throwaway13

Learning
if there is a norm for my triggered states, i haven't noticed it yet. each round is unique, but i have gone through several rounds of prolonged triggered states. my early dx'es were from before the ptsd theories had come together, but i think i hear one or two of my shrinks making statements which could have translated to having been stuck in a quasi-permanent triggered state for years before i reached their doors. they called it, "a manic state," but that was the most accurate description available back then.

the good news is that with heightened awareness and psychotherapy tools, i can typically calm my trigger events far more efficiently these days.
If a loved one were to talk to you about your triggered state do you think it would make it worse? I tried a few times and it seemed like that did not help at all it made it worse.
 

arfie

MyPTSD Pro
If a loved one were to talk to you about your triggered state do you think it would make it worse?

herstorically, this has been the case for me. after 42 years, my partner and i can talk about it some, but he is so close to my heart and so deeply connected to my hopes and dreams that the emotional connection confuses and escalates the trigger event with discouraging and devastating speed. it might be more accurate to say that he can listen some. he used to be so intent on fixing all my problems that his noble intentions all to often made me feel hopelessly broken. he helps me much more by simply listening and expressing confidence in my ability to work it through on my own.

addendum
setting boundaries is another subject. there are parts of my psychoses (pl) which hubby simply cannot handle. i work to respect his right to personal boundaries and carry those parts of the psycho weirds to my therapy support network.
 

throwaway13

Learning
herstorically, this has been the case for me. after 42 years, my partner and i can talk about it some, but he is so close to my heart and so deeply connected to my hopes and dreams that the emotional connection confuses and escalates the trigger event with discouraging and devastating speed. it might be more accurate to say that he can listen some. he used to be so intent on fixing all my problems that his noble intentions all to often made me feel hopelessly broken. he helps me much more by simply listening and expressing confidence in my ability to work it through on my own.

addendum
setting boundaries is another subject. there are parts of my psychoses (pl) which hubby simply cannot handle. i work to respect his right to personal boundaries and carry those parts of the psycho weirds to my therapy support network.
I can see the truth in that statement. I tried to “fix” what I thought I could and it backfired big time. Now I’m just trying to be patient and supportive and I can see this wall of isolation being taken apart brick by brick.
 

caroline_13

MyPTSD Pro
herstorically, this has been the case for me. after 42 years, my partner and i can talk about it some, but he is so close to my heart and so deeply connected to my hopes and dreams that the emotional connection confuses and escalates the trigger event with discouraging and devastating speed. it might be more accurate to say that he can listen some. he used to be so intent on fixing all my problems that his noble intentions all to often made me feel hopelessly broken. he helps me much more by simply listening and expressing confidence in my ability to work it through on my own.

addendum
setting boundaries is another subject. there are parts of my psychoses (pl) which hubby simply cannot handle. i work to respect his right to personal boundaries and carry those parts of the psycho weirds to my therapy support network.
Your husband sounds so sweet. You are lucky.
 

Sweetpea76

Moderator
I don’t know about triggered, but my partner has long periods of time when he is highly symptomatic.

If a loved one were to talk to you about your triggered state do you think it would make it worse? I tried a few times and it seemed like that did not help at all it made it worse.

I don’t see that going well…

Everybody is different, so finding a “normal” or “typical” pattern isn’t possible. You can maybe figure out a “typical” for your wife.

My vet has a pattern of behaviors. He deviates from it at times, but I have been watching this rollercoaster for 10 years. I know he’s going to be a snippy asshole when he’s stressed, and he isolates as a coping mechanism. He does not want to have any kind of deep discussion about anything unless he is in a good place. He cannot handle my tears at all.

Once you watch the behaviors for awhile you will start to see patterns.
 

throwaway13

Learning
I don’t know about triggered, but my partner has long periods of time when he is highly symptomatic.



I don’t see that going well…

Everybody is different, so finding a “normal” or “typical” pattern isn’t possible. You can maybe figure out a “typical” for your wife.

My vet has a pattern of behaviors. He deviates from it at times, but I have been watching this rollercoaster for 10 years. I know he’s going to be a snippy asshole when he’s stressed, and he isolates as a coping mechanism. He does not want to have any kind of deep discussion about anything unless he is in a good place. He cannot handle my tears at all.

Once you watch the behaviors for awhile you will start to see patterns.
Oh it didn’t go well at all. I thought I’d be able to point out some obvious things she was doing that led me to believe she was symptomatic. Even going as far as getting books on ptsd and trying to read passages to her. Thought it would help if she knew I was trying to educate myself about the condition. Nope- big mistake
 

throwaway13

Learning
Hell no… might as punch yourself in the face.

I can’t remember, is she treated right now? Or is she off the rails and untreated?
She says she’s going to therapy, but I don’t know how honest she’s being with the therapist.

It seems like the road to going back to normal is one step forward two steps back then three steps forward. I’m seeing a therapist as well and he’s just as confused as me by her behavior
 

throwaway13

Learning
Trauma therapy is rough. It makes things worse before it gets better. Getting therapy for yourself is a very good idea, because this is a mindf*ck.
My head is spinning. It got to the point where I had to tell her that the elephant in the room has a name, and it’s ptsd. I only can hope she is being honest with her therapist.

I’m still seeing the marriage therapist we went to two times. She lost it in the second session when i brought up that I thought ptsd was triggered after being dormant for years. She lost it in front of the therapist and he is also convinced ptsd is running her.

It’s been slowing down the last few weeks. She has been opening up slowly and has started talking about her feelings again. I just don’t know how much longer I can handle this
 
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