How to handle this trigger.

QueenBeefy

New Here
Good morning,

A little context, September 21st, 2005 and I was only ten years old. My best friend and I were alone at the bus stop when a man tried to lure us into his car using multiple method of coersion. He was arrested later that day due to me being really well trained for that situation and remember detailed including license plates. I am now 28 and the same man who tried to kidnap is friends with someone I know on FB. Now, I did do my detailed stalking (thankfully everything was public) and the second I showed my mom his face (she met him face to face during court), she knew. We are 100% sure it is him. I recently discovered the laws on level one sex offenders and found out he might not even have to tell anyone of these charges anymore. Including his new wife and step daughter who seems to be around the age of ten. Now, im aware I hurt myself when stalking his Facebook but now im stuck with so many emotions and I don't know what to do. I am currently not in counseling as I have been trying to find a new one and the last lady I went to discredited my previous diagnosis and said "its pretty rare to develop PTSD without being active duty". As a psychology major, im aware how wrong and unethical that was but as the anxious and hurt human I still am; I now feel even more discouraged to get help but now I know I need it. What are ways I can help myself get over this. Clearly I can't change anything about the situation but now a part of me wants to expose the guy and tell him wife. A part of me knows, nobody would believe me even with proof or even care. I wish I could talk to my friend who went through it with me but she recently passed away.
 
It’s not the first time Facebook has been the conduit for bringing up things that have been put away long ago. I’m sorry that’s happened for you.

If it were me? Short term I’d delete the FB app (actually, that’s what I personally did). It wasn’t worth the price I was paying, and all of the positives it did offer were things I could get elsewhere.

Opting out on my own behalf was really therapeutic for me - I didn’t do it for any other reason than self compassion. And once I put it behind me, the urge to dig around and protect other people abated.

The second thing, if you haven’t already, would be to get a therapist (who actually understands trauma!!) to work through this. The thoughts and feelings that have come up for you are natural, but very distressing, and it might be helpful to have someone to help you work through them.
 
I was in a similar situation when I was 7-10 with a neighbord (lawyer) following me around masturbating in the bushes. My alcoholic parents told me to "stay away from him." Disgusting cowards. Anyway, after therapy in my early 20's I went back to confront him and went up to his door. He had just died of a heart attack. Lucky for him. I was going to confront him and then go to the police to let them know. I know I wasn't the only one. That is not how these predators work. I wasn't going to have it on my conscience that he could hurt another child under any circumstances. I also told his family who I'm sure were aware of it anyway. I actually found it very healing and I also wanted to take my power back and that is what I did. These are evil people and have no place being protected. I would absolutely tell his current wife and I would go to the local police to make sure they knew this predator was living in town. Whether they believe me or not is not my problem. I was going to do the right thing for myself and any other innocent children.
 
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