How To Know? What Does My Wife See With My PTSD?

[somaliaspouse]

gday everyone my name is paul.ive had p.t.s.d for7 years i know when im suffering the effects of it i.e yelling at my kids ,flying off the handle. how do i know what my wife see's in the p.t.s.d in me so i can see it too? i hope this m
akes sense to someone. paul. the reason i ask is because since i was diagnosed it has only been the lasttwo months my wife has made me aware that she is worried for her and the kids if i go off. she says she walks on egg shells around me not to upset me therefore doesnt say anything to me incase it upsets me so i want to know so she can relax a bit.

 

[anthony]

Paul, what they see is their worst nightmare. When we get angry, we are usually quite scarey for our partners, and I am talking about the physical sense. They are often scared that we are going to hurt them, or hurt our own children because of our inner anger.

Honestly, if you've had PTSD for 7 years, its been more than just 2 months, as Kim has been on here before, and spoken with my wife, and I think you might find its similar to most, in that when we are diagnosed, we're generally already at our worst. Our spouses walk on egg shells constantly, most just don't say anything for the fear of upsetting us and making things worse for themselves.

Our spouses put up with a lot of shit from us with PTSD, and we think they don't, where kidding ourselves. Yes, often relationships containing PTSD partners tend to blame everything upon PTSD, even the normal male characteristic silly things we do and say, as it becomes hard for them to even differentiate between what is us being male, and what is us with PTSD.

PTSD consumes us, there is no doubt about it. I think you already know that though. Even though we may accept we have it, we can often still live in denial that it affects us to any great length. We are wrong! It affects us every day, and that is why our partners walk on eggshells constantly, usually without us knowing.

I think this topic would be better explained by having a spouse give you the exact vision that Kim would be viewing from you. I can say that, as what we think, and what we do, are two very different things. Ever spouse of someone with PTSD, whether male or female, all say the same things, can relate to each other as we can, with immediate understanding of any topic related to our behaviour. Its actually quite scarey.

Spouses, could you please give your side to Paul, as I am still a bit biased, being I suffer PTSD and all....