Sufferer I’ve been blindfolded my entire life.

spinninghaze

New Here
Hello! I’m a 20 year old female - a sophomore in college - and I feel like for the first time in my life I’m able to see things without a blindfold. I grew up in a hoarders house, where I was introduced to sexual and emotional trauma incredibly young, with parents who neglected to provide me with comfort or services for my autism. I masked and was shaped to believe there was nothing wrong with my living situation. As I grew, I met a friend in elementary school who had a similar homelife. We would engage in sexual and other destructive behaviors. In middle school, though, I lost contact and was forced to stay home and to take up an online school option. I had a hot spot with a limited amount of data, so I was prohibited from using the internet outside of classwork. Of course, I snuck around this, and ended up meeting a 23 year old man when I was 16. He cared for me and comforted me in a way I had never seen before. So, when he only asked for sex and control of my schedule, I thought it was a small thing to ask. I thought it was normal for him to take advantage of me while I was sleeping.

Going into college, I continued my relationship with this male. I started to meet people and befriend multiple individuals at campus who slowly learned more and more about my life. They were worried about me and provided me with resources to get help. It’s been one year since I’ve moved out of my parents house, and broke up with my rapist.

And for the first time, I feel like the blindfold has been lifted. The only issue is that now that I’ve gotten to the safest place in my life... my PTSD and other disorders have really kicked in. I’ve started my lengthy journey to recovery.

That’s why I have joined this forum. I know many people have experienced things like me - and it’s not okay. I look forward to meeting people and utilizing the forum as I need in my recovery.
 
Last edited by a moderator:

Friday

Moderator
First off... Welcome to the community! 😁

Putting on my mod-hat for a moment... we don’t use trigger warnings here, as this is a space for people affected by trauma to discuss all aspects of it freely... people would have to use TWs instead of spaces or punctuation if we went down the route of guessing what could trigger someone else. So I’ve edited it out for you, and no worries.

Again, welcome!
 

spinninghaze

New Here
First off... Welcome to the community! 😁

Putting on my mod-hat for a moment... we don’t use trigger warnings here, as this is a space for people affected by trauma to discuss all aspects of it freely... people would have to use TWs instead of spaces or punctuation if we went down the route of guessing what could trigger someone else. So I’ve edited it out for you, and no worries.

Again, welcome!

Alright, thanks for alerting me - makes sense! :)
 

TruthSeeker

MyPTSD Pro
Hello! I’m a 20 year old female - a sophomore in college - and I feel like for the first time in my life I’m able to see things without a blindfold. I grew up in a hoarders house, where I was introduced to sexual and emotional trauma incredibly young, with parents who neglected to provide me with comfort or services for my autism. I masked and was shaped to believe there was nothing wrong with my living situation. As I grew, I met a friend in elementary school who had a similar homelife. We would engage in sexual and other destructive behaviors. In middle school, though, I lost contact and was forced to stay home and to take up an online school option. I had a hot spot with a limited amount of data, so I was prohibited from using the internet outside of classwork. Of course, I snuck around this, and ended up meeting a 23 year old man when I was 16. He cared for me and comforted me in a way I had never seen before. So, when he only asked for sex and control of my schedule, I thought it was a small thing to ask. I thought it was normal for him to take advantage of me while I was sleeping.

Going into college, I continued my relationship with this male. I started to meet people and befriend multiple individuals at campus who slowly learned more and more about my life. They were worried about me and provided me with resources to get help. It’s been one year since I’ve moved out of my parents house, and broke up with my rapist.

And for the first time, I feel like the blindfold has been lifted. The only issue is that now that I’ve gotten to the safest place in my life... my PTSD and other disorders have really kicked in. I’ve started my lengthy journey to recovery.

That’s why I have joined this forum. I know many people have experienced things like me - and it’s not okay. I look forward to meeting people and utilizing the forum as I need in my recovery.
Welcome, and glad to have you here! There are many forums and tons of information here. People are typically very responsive and helpful. This is a good place to bounce things off of folks, so catch you around!
 
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