GreySouled
Learning
A few sessions ago, my T did a major thing and opened up about her personal life/past. She informed me that her father, and even her mother, used to "beat the sh!t" out of her and her sibling(s). She said she knows dissociation, used to leave her body, knows what that's like, a child has no choice but to do what a bigger stronger grownup tells them to do. I totally intellectually understand why she may have let this personal information out in session, BUT she knows I have an attachment disorder and am currently attached to her, quite excruciatingly painfully. She knows I am easily triggered when it comes to out-of-the-blue disclosures and especially from HER! I understand that she was trying to make me see that a child can bear no blame or culpability whatsoever when it comes to CSA. I know she was trying to help me in some way.
However, I desperately need not for this to happen again. After the few days it took me to process the session and what it had to do with me, then there was the "OMG, my poor beloved T was beaten to a pulp on the regular as a child" panic and nausea, and I just didn't need that.
Part of me wants to just gently tell/remind her to please not disclose painful personal information such as this in future. Part of me feels like I'd be shooting myself in the foot in some way because this woman who keeps her personal cards so close to the vest (I'd like to think mostly because I've asked her to) decided it would be to my benefit to go ahead and share this traumatic part of her life/childhood, and I'd just be spitting in her face to reproach her for such.
What do you guys think I should do?
This attachment is so painful, I'd be willing to "dump" her if I thought I could find another T as competent on such short notice.
However, I desperately need not for this to happen again. After the few days it took me to process the session and what it had to do with me, then there was the "OMG, my poor beloved T was beaten to a pulp on the regular as a child" panic and nausea, and I just didn't need that.
Part of me wants to just gently tell/remind her to please not disclose painful personal information such as this in future. Part of me feels like I'd be shooting myself in the foot in some way because this woman who keeps her personal cards so close to the vest (I'd like to think mostly because I've asked her to) decided it would be to my benefit to go ahead and share this traumatic part of her life/childhood, and I'd just be spitting in her face to reproach her for such.
What do you guys think I should do?
This attachment is so painful, I'd be willing to "dump" her if I thought I could find another T as competent on such short notice.