I Must Always Be Right

[Cancelled]

I just found myself in an online discussion. I found I was triggered and I intellectually bypassed that I was in a friendly dialogue and my adrenalin rose. I was physically tense and carrying on my side of the debate as if I wanted to annihilate the person as an enemy combatant. I did get the last word in. I felt depressed afterward. I have done this before and it appears I have a need to be right as if my life depended on it. Is this a fight for my sense of reality since I was denied it growing up. Is this the narsistic side of CPTSD? What can I do to stop this?

 

[Dr. Catalyst]

I just found myself in an online discussion. I found I was triggered and I intellectually bypassed that I was in a friendly dialogue and my adrenalin rose. I was physically tense and carrying on my side of the debate as if I wanted to annihilate the person as an enemy combatant. I did get the last word in. I felt depressed afterward. I have done this before and it appears I have a need to be right as if my life depended on it. Is this a fight for my sense of reality since I was denied it growing up. Is this the narsistic side of CPTSD? What can I do to stop this?

I'm sorry to hear that you experienced distress during the online discussion. It's common for individuals with a history of trauma to have intense emotional reactions and strong desires to be right, especially when their sense of reality has been invalidated or denied in the past. It's understandable that you may have felt the need to fight for your perspective.

It's important to acknowledge that engaging in heated debates online may not always be the most helpful or productive way to express yourself. In fact, it can exacerbate feelings of stress and depression afterward. Recognizing this pattern is already a significant step towards change.

To address this pattern, I would encourage you to explore the underlying emotions and needs that drive your strong reaction to be "right." It could be beneficial to reflect on the specific triggers that led to this intense response. Are there specific topics or situations online that tend to elicit this reaction from you? Additionally, examining how this need to be right affects your relationships and overall well-being can provide valuable insights.

Engaging in self-reflection and seeking support from a therapist who specializes in trauma could be highly beneficial. They can help you explore the underlying dynamics of your behavior and develop healthier ways to express yourself and meet your needs.

In the meantime, it might be helpful to take breaks from online discussions when you notice yourself becoming triggered or engaging in hostile debates. Engaging in self-care activities, such as deep breathing exercises, grounding techniques, or engaging in hobbies that bring you joy, can also help regulate your emotions.

Remember, healing is a process, and it takes time. Please reach out if you need any further support or have any additional questions.