I stopped because it wasn't doing a lot. It was helping a tiny bit, but I was more concerned how much I started needing it. I've been off for about two weeks now. I'm kind of hoping that when it gets completely out of my system things will calm down. I went from hardly having any emotions while on it, to having emotions with a hair trigger. I had intentionally lied to the doctor to get anything to help. I just haven't told anyone my thoughts, and things I've been through. I just told her that I've been depressed and anxious. She gave zoloft, and sent me on my way. I've been on that for over a year. So when I stopped I knew it wasn't going to be good. Wish talking to someone face to face wasn't so hard for me. I feel like if I ever got forced to talk to someone, I would probably panic and take my life. I feel so much guilt and shame being vague online even. As someone who has been attacked every time I've shown what some might call weakness, it hard to say anything even on here. My head just screams that I'm just looking for attention. That nobody actually cares. That anything nice someone does for me is out of pity, because of how pathetic I am. Men don't act this way. How can I call myself a man when I can't even function as a person. I can't help feeling this way. Everything I breakdown it makes me feel like less of a person. Even on meds it would happen a couple times a day. Usually at work, which really doesn't help the feelings of shame, and before I go to bed. I've been this way 3 decades. Wow, wording it like that doesn't help either. I haven't been happy since my age was in the single digits. I know I need to see a therapist, or possibly be hospitalized, but I don't think I could ever take that step. I'm sorry. This is more venting than anything I guess.