I'm going to go to Therapy, but... I don’t know what to say about “What brings you to therapy?”

GuyBloke

New Here
I'm not actually sure what's wrong, or what the end goal of therapy would be. I was going to sometimes last year, but then I quietly forgot about it, started working, etc. I'm concerned about the question: "What brings you to therapy?"

I guess I've remembered recently a day we were all wasting time outside library at school, someone brought up what happened in the first post I wrote away back, just mentioned it out loud and everybody heard. I can't remember every name and face in earshot, but it was brought up the same way you might recognise a movie you watched with friends or family years ago. Point being, everybody knew, almost everyone I knew at school knew, the pieces of work who took part in it knew, I immediately zoned out as the topic was brought up and don't remember what happened next. Nobody said a f*cking thing all them years, so that's been fun going back over the few, specific, memories of school with the added context that, ok it's not common knowledge, but someone can lightly laugh about doing something like that and everybody ignores it, including me. So who else knew? Even a f*cking teacher might have known, I can't remember.

All this is had me thinking in circles, lots of people knew, at least one of my family members knew, all my friends knew (stupid use of the word I know) and there were at least two other instances that happened in school at later dates. I'll just assume they were unrelated.

This can't be what brings me to therapy though? I've been acting strangely for the past few weeks, but I've no idea how to describe it, nor how to fix it. I can't listen to audiobooks at work anymore, in one ear out the other, can't play games at home either and I've regressed back to how I was when I started work (unable to introduce myself or start conversation). Disconnected might be the word, or stuck in my own mind thinking about the paragraphs above?

The best I can say is I'm stuck in that state, where you remember that cringe thing you said years ago even though its 1am and you're trying to sleep, but I've felt like that all day for nearly a week now, its enough.
Now I have to say this to a therapist with a straight face >:/ Oh boy
 

Recovery4Me

MyPTSD Pro
Sometimes we can place stress producing expectations on ourselves to narrate our story in a certain manner. Part of the therapist job is to assist us during the journey and allow the movement at a pace that is healthy for us. So congratulations on your choice to move forward and know it shows courage on your part...wanting to heal. Take care.
 

Sues

Confident
Your description sounds like a good reason to me. Write it out and read it if you have to, but tell your therapist what's going on and what's bothering you. It doesn't matter if it makes sense or not, it's what you need help with right now, and that is exactly why we go to therapy.
 

Survivor3

MyPTSD Pro
Sounds like a good reason to go to therapy. I have those cringe moments often about things I've said or done. It's embarrassing and shameful. But I work it out with my counsellor. Good luck!!.🙂
 
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