• 💖 [Donate To Keep MyPTSD Online] 💖 Every contribution, no matter how small, fuels our mission and helps us continue to provide peer-to-peer services. Your generosity keeps us independent and available freely to the world. MyPTSD closes if we can't reach our annual goal.

I'm not really there

Status
Not open for further replies.

warmblanket

New Here
i dont know how to describe this feeling i have... i'm seeing a distorded version of myself all the time. sometimes when people talk it sounds like they are underwater. sometimes when i eat it's like i'm not even tasting my food. when i look out my window, it's a painting. when i'm outside, it's like everything is made out of cardboard and about to fall over. these feelings aren't new to me, in fact i'm numb to them. how do i feel again? i have shut myself off from the world around me. i'm completely disconnected, floating in nothingness. i just need to know that someone else has felt this way.
 
So much of what you described is familiar to me. Dissociation is really tough to deal with! But realize that it is normal. And that as you go through therapy for your trauma, it will eventually decrease. It may get a little or a lot worse initially, as you process the past, but it will go away or decrease significantly and you'll feel real again.
Sending support your way!
 
You are not alone. My therapists have said dissociation is a type of coping mechanism to help our mind escape trauma. It will improve with therapy and time. Try to not be hard on yourself and have self compassion. Do some things you find comforting. For me it is cuddling with my animals or watching a movie I enjoy. It is hard to not beat myself up and remember to practice self compassion. (((Hugs)))
 
Sounds familiar!

Do you know any coping skills or grounding skills that help?

For me, the only thing that works is making sure my system and inner child feel safe. Typical grounding skills don't work because they don't make me feel safe.
 
thank you everyone for replying. i'm currently in therapy but not doing trauma because i'm not stable enough. hopefully soon i'll start to work on it. thanks again for the kind words and suggestions.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top