Sufferer Im trying to seek help but getting nowhere.

Hello, Autistic 29yo survivor of 2 decades of abuse from parents, neglect, and sexual abuse.
I'm here to talk with others and learn healthy coping strategies.

I've been trying to get a appointment to speak to a therapist for 6 weeks now and no one calls me back.. I've been referred by my primary doc to 2 different behavioral health centers.. I've gone in twice, filled out paperwork, brought it back, was told it was too late on a Friday (3:30pm they close at 7pm) to make a future appointment!? Was told to come back Monday and if I came early enough and got in line someone might be able to see me..
Im not able to work much so dont have the money to waste driving back and forth for a "maybe".
I've called twice and explained the situation, they said someone will call me back, weeks passed and nothing happens..
I'm just starting to feel really defeated and I feel like I'm loosing hope, I went into this 100% ready to work on things and I feel like I'm being ignored.
I just wanted to make a scheduled appointment and see someone to get the ball rolling, is it normally this difficult in the beginning?


Welcome to the forum!

Unfortunately where I am, trauma therapists are few and far between. My current T is retiring at the end of the year, so I got my referral in to the guy I'm hoping will take over last month (you read that right: 9 months in advance!).

There are stop gap measures in some places, like more generalist mental health therapists and support services that can provide crisis support in the meantime. Perhaps that might be something to have in the back pocket.

Hope it works out soon.


is it normally this difficult in the beginning?
Oh yeah.

Unless you get reeeeeeally lucky A) finding a therapist & B) finding the right therapist …who both has training/experience in what you want assistance with AND your personalities work well together (the ever elusive, or absolute baseline requirement, “good fit” goal)… is very much akin to finding a job.

Sometimes, with both, you just get lucky. First application, in, done. Dream job, or great therapist. More often? It’s a slog of applications/interviews/waiting or calls/ waiting/ interview-appointments/ more calls/ more waiting /more interview appointments. 😵‍💫

I’d taken finding an amaaaaaazing ADHD therapist and turned it into an artform… so it was a rude and unexpected trial to have so much difficulty finding a trauma therapist I could work with. The first time took me the better part of a year? Longer? I’d have to go look it up. Long enough that I started to search in batches, with a few months off, in between. Findinf HIM took dozens of appointments/ hundreds of phone calls, with other therapists. (And he was absolutely amazing, totally worth the search). The second time I just got lucky. First call, first appointment, hey! This might actually work?!? Wow.

But I was used to over 20 years of moving every few months & then finding a new ADHD therapist in a matter few hours of research, a couple calls, short list of great options, & in like Flynn within the week. (Total artform. I was wicked good at at it.) So the WTF IS THIS?!? slog really knocked me on my ass.

In part? That’s just PTSD. A finite capacity for stress, spiking symptoms, and the level of desperation it takes (me) to start looking for outside help? Makes even everyday tasks like scaling Everest, much less things involving phones (hate), appointments (hate more, shudder), being social on cue (f*ck off), plus the whole avoidance (symptom & coping mechanism) thing? <low whistle> Even when I got lucky with the first call, it was a nerve wrecking and exhausting process. Just because I was doing really badly, at the time.

Welcome to the community!

Hang in there!

…& in the meantime? Avail yourself of any all help/respite you can get 😎


hello chasi. welcome to the forum.

those first steps are the hardest and making that first breakthrough can be frustrating in the extreme. the good news is that it gets easier once you learn all those pesky little details of making that first breakthrough.

steadying support while you find your way through. easy does it.


I dont have the energy to answer everyone individually right now.
Also totally normal 🙂