In it for the long haul!

Livi

Learning
This is a bit of a rant that I just needed to put this out into the world. I am at the point of my recovery where I have some good weeks and the time between 'episodes' and symptoms is getting a little longer. But I am also at the point where I am realising that the shit part - the dysregulation, nightmares and triggers are not really ever going to be gone. When it all kicks in again, I feel so defeated, like.... 'Here we go again!' I comfort myself with the fact that at least now I have names for all the things and tools to help me, but still, it's so frustrating and my energy levels feel so low. This really isn't going to go away is it? I know this logically, but the reality of it feels so exhausting. I sometimes feel so depleted and so defeated. I am just fed up with 'managing' it, and when it comes around again, it makes me feel like I am broken. Constantly picking myself up and resetting myself is so bloody exhausting!
Ok... Rant over!
 

arfie

MyPTSD Pro
gentle empathy on the plight, livi. the good news is that the less energy i put into hating my condition and wishing for panaceas, the more energy and insight i have for getting the job done. more and more, i don't see it as too far different than what a diabetic feels when they have to constantly monitor their blood sugar, etc. yea, it's a drag, but a rich, full life is possible in spite of it.

as a bonus, i've come to love some truly heroic souls whom i never would have met without the demands of my condition.

rant freely and often about the frustrations of the demands. it really can help if for no other reason than the cathartic value.
 

Livi

Learning
gentle empathy on the plight, livi. the good news is that the less energy i put into hating my condition and wishing for panaceas, the more energy and insight i have for getting the job done. more and more, i don't see it as too far different than what a diabetic feels when they have to constantly monitor their blood sugar, etc. yea, it's a drag, but a rich, full life is possible in spite of it.

as a bonus, i've come to love some truly heroic souls whom i never would have met without the demands of my condition.

rant freely and often about the frustrations of the demands. it really can help if for no other reason than the cathartic value.
Thank you so much for this Arfie, wise words and much needed. Thanks for 'listening!'
 
8

8Swallows

Thank you so much for expressing just how I feel.The nightmares for me are the worst, I just dread going to bed.one day I feel a little brighter then downhill once again. I married a couple of months ago, stupidly thinking it would help to be in a loving relationshi, but lack of understanding by my partner just makes for a bigger void than before
 

Livi

Learning
Thank you so much for expressing just how I feel.The nightmares for me are the worst, I just dread going to bed.one day I feel a little brighter then downhill once again. I married a couple of months ago, stupidly thinking it would help to be in a loving relationshi, but lack of understanding by my partner just makes for a bigger void than before
I hear you @8swallows, it's the constant rollercoaster that makes it so exhausting, isn't it? Pulling yourself back up is so tiring.
 
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