HealingMama
MyPTSD Pro
So I think I have a protector that is sabotaging my efforts at experiencing healthy attachment.
It becomes very angry very easily.
In my therapy last visit, the therapist wanted me to move into the feeling of a recent triggering event and I felt myself start to dissociate. So I grabbed the weighted blanket and tried again.
The thing is, I am so exhausted from fighting everything and everyone that wants to love me. Or fighting when things become calm and safe. And I don't know how to stop.
I think according to IFS I shouldn't think of the protector as sabotaging my life because it is created to help. It is there to serve a higher purpose.
But I am so tired of trying to create things and then re-creating them. My poor partner. I am so damn controlling and can't tolerate last minute changes to the schedule. I really don't want him to have to cater to me this much but I don't know another way. You can't see new things from the same level as the problem.
What do you do about your protector parts?
It becomes very angry very easily.
In my therapy last visit, the therapist wanted me to move into the feeling of a recent triggering event and I felt myself start to dissociate. So I grabbed the weighted blanket and tried again.
The thing is, I am so exhausted from fighting everything and everyone that wants to love me. Or fighting when things become calm and safe. And I don't know how to stop.
I think according to IFS I shouldn't think of the protector as sabotaging my life because it is created to help. It is there to serve a higher purpose.
But I am so tired of trying to create things and then re-creating them. My poor partner. I am so damn controlling and can't tolerate last minute changes to the schedule. I really don't want him to have to cater to me this much but I don't know another way. You can't see new things from the same level as the problem.
What do you do about your protector parts?