PreciousChild
MyPTSD Pro
Hi all, I've been trying to not be so codependent and am trying to mind my own business. But I've been tempted for a long while to give feedback to my bf about his ex and the way she parents her child. I never even met her, so here I am speculating about her from hearsay, but the struggles that their child faces are real, so maybe I'm justified in butting in? Their child gets in trouble just about every day at school. My bf has to work long hours, so she does all the parenting during the week. From what he tells me, she explodes at him just about every morning for not waking up on time, or whatever. He says that she has not ability to control her impulses. So I feel that she sets up a model for her own child and his ability not to control himself (he's a tween). She tells my bf that he's just a difficult child, which I feel is her way of justifying her yelling at him. My bf tells me that she has never been able to apologize or take responsibility for her behavior. But they will then go about setting up all kinds of punishments for his "bad" behaviors, which I think worsens the situation.
My bf feels somewhat helpless because he counts on her to do the parenting during the week. So whatever impulsive punishment she devises, he feels obligated to enforce whatever she decides to do even though she herself often changes her mind about consequences since she usually exacts too harsh a consequence while she's angry.
My bf will call me if he gets a call from school, upset that his son's in trouble again. So he does ask for feedback, but mostly about what is a "fair" punishment. But I want to nudge him to see that maybe his kid isn't so "bad" and that maybe he's just reacting to her parenting. I should probably just mind my own business.
My bf feels somewhat helpless because he counts on her to do the parenting during the week. So whatever impulsive punishment she devises, he feels obligated to enforce whatever she decides to do even though she herself often changes her mind about consequences since she usually exacts too harsh a consequence while she's angry.
My bf will call me if he gets a call from school, upset that his son's in trouble again. So he does ask for feedback, but mostly about what is a "fair" punishment. But I want to nudge him to see that maybe his kid isn't so "bad" and that maybe he's just reacting to her parenting. I should probably just mind my own business.