Is there a place for the rejected ones?

Deleted member 50975

Policy Enforcement
Not Active
I am probably suffering from PTSD but my main diagnosis is BPD. SOMETIMES the BPD is a manifestation of the trauma and other times the BPD is the reason for why the emotionally or physically painful thing happened to me. Either way...just wanted to give some context for why I'm asking this.

Is there a forum here or even somewhere else online where all of human society's rejected people can go to be safe and talk?

I've known for a long time that I don't belong here on Earth. The fact that I experienced traumas in the first place was due to my BPD...we humans consider sensitive people to be a liability so we mistreat them so they either die or kill themselves...or at the very least remove themselves from the gene pool.

I've done my part by not having kids. I haven't really built up the courage to kill myself yet. If I could find a truly safe place anywhere...where I am understood as the runt of society's litter, where I can be with other runts...maybe I wouldn't have to kill myself.

See, I was born very sensitive and have had poor health all my life despite being very into health. My mother abandoned me in my crib to cry for hours and my dad beat me, screamed at me, and insulted me. They were following animal instincts to get rid of me. Other kids never wanted me around. My brother physically threatened me often and he cut me out of his life completely 2 years ago. My mother told my husband she wished for a long time that id kill myself so she could be free. My dad couldn't wait to unload me on someone and was glad my husband was up to the task.
I have very few friends and cant keep a job. I'm usually a very hard worker desperate to finally be loved and accepted but it never happens. I leave because the stress overwhelms me.

I have felt for a long time the biological truth of my existence....i shouldn't be here. I didn't deserve to be mistreated of course but I know why I was. It was the human family trying to remove me. Because I am a liability.

Where can I go to be among the other rejected ones? They will understand what this existence is. They will know why it's hopeless and maybe we can just hug until the lights go out forever.
 

ladee

MyPTSD Pro
Well I can only speak for myself, but as a rejected one myself I have found this forum the safest place to be heard and understood. Tho it is a forum for PTSD, there are many here with co diagnosis. If you feel this forum will help you then give it a try.

People here understand me. They support me. And when I come here, I don't feel alone.

Hope you give yourself and this community a chance. Glad you found us.
 

Chris-duck

MyPTSD Pro
Firstly I'm really sorry for how you were treated, but I have some thoughts
Is there a forum here or even somewhere else online where all of human society's rejected people can go to be safe and talk?
What does this mean? Everyone here has experienced trauma or cares about someone who has. I wouldn't consider any of those people, or you, "societies rejected"
The fact that I experienced traumas in the first place was due to my BPD...we humans consider sensitive people to be a liability so we mistreat them so they either die or kill themselves...or at the very least remove themselves from the gene pool.
I dont think people really put this thought to it, do you feel comfy saying more about what has made you feel that way? Cos there's a lot of cognitive distortions in there.
where I can be with other runts.
Um. Call yourself whatever you want, and insult yourself however you like. But I don't consider myself a runt. So maybe I'm just not who you want around... Or maybe you wanna look at how you view other people who have experienced trauma.
 

internal

Sponsor
Where can I go to be among the other rejected ones? They will understand what this existence is. They will know why it's hopeless and maybe we can just hug until the lights go out forever.
you can come and stay here. we have some rules but if you follow them (the primary being, "you are responsible for your own trigger" and "if someone says some thing you do not like, ignore it or try to under stand it by asking questions.")

i have bpd as well and i follow those rules for my self. the other that "if you get angry, disengage." or go to your trauma diary if you wish to make one (within the member-diaries section you could. it is like a little place just for you.)

and speak there. i truly relate with you of feeling that you are not a human and that you are rejected and do not belong any where. but i have found many people here who know me for who i am (at least some of that), and they have not rejected me.

we are a place of trauma survivors. our world is a little different. you can come in.
 

Deleted member 50975

Policy Enforcement
Not Active
Firstly I'm really sorry for how you were treated, but I have some thoughts

What does this mean? Everyone here has experienced trauma or cares about someone who has. I wouldn't consider any of those people, or you, "societies rejected"

I dont think people really put this thought to it, do you feel comfy saying more about what has made you feel that way? Cos there's a lot of cognitive distortions in there.

Um. Call yourself whatever you want, and insult yourself however you like. But I don't consider myself a runt. So maybe I'm just not who you want around... Or maybe you wanna look at how you view other people who have experienced trauma.
You definitely misunderstood me and are not one of the people I am talking about nor did I say that all people who experienced trauma are like me. You might want to check what you are reacting to because i never said those words. I probably should have clarified that not all people who experience trauma are "runts," but all people who are "runts" experience trauma due to being "runts." You are probably a normal person had some bad things happen to you. You are much more likely than I am to actually recover because you have pure PTSD and not other disorders. I could be wrong, but I in NO WAY said I feel the way I feel about myself toward ALL people who experienced trauma.
 

joeylittle

Administrator
@velmaolden - you're already off to a rocky start here. There is some material in your OP that could be misread, so I'm glad you had the opportunity to correct some mistaken assumptions. That being said...
You are probably a normal person had some bad things happen to you. You are much more likely than I am to actually recover because you have pure PTSD and not other disorders. I could be wrong
...it's not that difficult to read the forum, to get to know the the members, to learn more about the people who are engaging with you.

And I would encourage you to not make assumptions about how severe other people's mental health issues might be.

Where can I go to be among the other rejected ones? They will understand what this existence is. They will know why it's hopeless and maybe we can just hug until the lights go out forever.
I can feel that there's a lot of pain in these words.

But you wouldn't be here writing if you didn't have some will, some desire, to find help towards recovery. I'd take some small solace in that - and it's true for many people here. You're not alone in it.
 

Movingforward10

MyPTSD Pro
I was actually called 'the runt' by my parents and oldest sister growing up.
So I'm jarring a bit with your post.

But: that doesn't make me unworthy. Or unlovable. Or a runt. Or anything. That just makes me someone who was mistreated as a child. And set up to have further trauma.

I'm not sure what you are looking for on here?
Everyone on here has suffered trauma in one or or other. Might not share the same history, but can relate mostly, to feelings and thoughts arising from that.
My focus is to get better, love me more, and have a more emotionally peaceful life. My focus is not to be 'a runt'. Why let abusers win? Sounds a horrendous place to be.
 
Top