Just seeking for some advice.

Zx_00

New Here
Hi. I have a girlfriend and we've been together for three years now. My girlfriend knows about my past experiences and how complicated my feelings and thoughts are. But I think she doesn't understand me very well because she often demands answer from me whenever I tell her what truly is in my mind. She often force me to explain what I am talking about and my feelings. Because of that sometimes I feel uninterested in talking to her. I often think about breaking up with her she demands answers from me because it stresses me out thinking how shall I explain something that I couldn't even understand. But I'm too afraid so it led to multiple lies just to satisfy her. I don't like lying to her but being honest often leads to quarrel and I don't like it as well because it gives me an uncomfortable feeling. What should I do? I really want to be honest with her but I don't want to argue with her.
 

Freddyt

MyPTSD Pro
I tell her what truly is in my mind. She often force me to explain what I am talking about and my feelings. Because of that sometimes I feel uninterested in talking to her.
Sounds to me like she wants to understand you. Also sounds to me like you created a problem you didn't have by telling lies.

2 things I know.
1. Anxiety is the biggest issue always. When she makes you feel anxious you act from fear. You both need to understand you need space and time to disconnect the anxiety from the question so you can answer it.

2. Be honest. If you can't be honest it will kill your relationship.

Controlling your anxiety is part one. Disconnecting your anxiety from questions can take time. Learn to control your PTSD cup. When you do you can control that, you can better describe your fear and anxiety level and how it affects your ability to function.

 

Weemie

MyPTSD Pro
What should I do? I really want to be honest with her but I don't want to argue with her.

Be honest with her. If it leads to a quarrel, then you will know that you are not compatible individuals. If she cannot respect your boundaries, it will be up to you to make a decision whether you want to pursue the relationship.
 

EveHarrington

MyPTSD Pro
I encourage you to set boundaries where if you tell her that you are not up for talking right now, she needs to stop questioning you. There is nothing wrong with telling someone you do not feel like discussing something with them, either now or ever.
 
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