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Lawyers, Doctors and Their Rejection of Me- My Very First Rant

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Limbo

New Here
This is something i really need to get off my chest. Who know perhaps typing it in here will make me feel better about it?

From the very beginning i had to fight to be recognized. The police didn't even have ME in their report!! So the insurance company wanted to deny me as well. Then (i was a teenager at the time), people at school told me i was "faking it"..despite the brace on my leg. On we go to the headaches which started not even a month after the accident. The doctor's did test after test then told me i was fine. I knew i wasn't fine...but they denied the results of my test (which HAD shown problems with my brain). The paramedics when i went into convulsions decided i was a druggie. (not the last i'd hear of this) Since i had self medicated with drugs and alcohol before, this dogged my steps. I suppose all the slash marks on my body didn't help their perception of me (just another way that i dealt wrongly with my pain). The neurologist decided i was childish for my age(um, hello, i have brain damage AND i only behaved that way PRIOR to my surgery) . The lawyers then picked up the druggie theme. Much to my dismay MY VERY OWN lawyer wouldn't belive me either. Recovery...now i am 19..two years older, out of school and i have to fight with the government that doesn't believe my disabilites (memory loss, difficulty concentrating, i was just in the process of relearning to read, cook, basic math, etc.)

For so many years, from everyone everywhere i looked was this denial of everything i had felt and been through. Looking back over this i can easily understand why i had such a hard time with denial myself. lol.

Why do all these professionals deny what they SEE in front of them? What is the point? They are supposed to be there to HELP, not to DESTROY a person.

Even now, the old anger, frustration, and desperate sorrow comes up. Somedays i wish i could sue them all...take their licenses away so that can't do it to anyone else.

Would that entire episode of my life have been so bad if i had been aknowledged?
 
you are the same age as my son, limbo. wish i was your mama, i'd have made somebody listen, or i'd just be on their doorstep every day
 
Limbo:

I thought I would help you with some insight into these professional's behaviours. Firstly, they are not right to treat you as such.

Lawyers and police are trained to look for discrepincies in a person's story and behaviour. It is their job to doubt and second guess everything, everyone says to them. They work with people who lie, cheat, steal, deny and harm others everyday. It is no suprise that they are making you feel like this. Chances are they do not even realize how they are treating you and how this makes you feel.

Paramedics see the worst of the worst for people in pain and drug addicts. It's natural that they will associate certain behaviours with this. They are not trained to recognize PTSD symptoms, so they will try and "fit" those symptoms into a nice and easy box.

As for the neourlogist: you need a new one. Someone in that feild should know that having brain damage will greatly affect how a person reacts and behaves.

This is in no way an excuse for how they behaved and treated you. I am just hoping it will help you to understand "where" this behaviour is coming from so that you can dismiss it, instead of taking it personally.

Bec
 
i must apologize. i get much too immersed in my thoughts, to the point of practically reliving them.

I'm 27 now. i suppose what i meant to say was that "when i turned 19".

Becvan: I do understand about the paramedics, about the police, etc..but i'm still having a hard time losing/overcoming the anger at being treated so badly. Posting in here has helped, and i suppose i just have to remind myself continuously until my automatic reaction is to understand that it was their jobs, instead of reacting emotionally. Fortunely, (at least i think so) this hasn't extended to all police, doctors, etc. Just those hazy memories of the faces of those that were there.

Reflecting on the need for this rant I've concluded that it was the lack of understanding on all of their parts which relates currently in my life to the lack of understanding that i feel i am getting from my husband. The similarities are there. With each of the previous people i am angry at for the betrayal (it feels like one) there is a implied trust relationship. With my husband there is definately a trust relationship. Is it wrong to feel betrayed by his seeming lack of willingness to understand what i'm going through?
 
Limbo, I must say that totally sucks. Just who do people think they are to treat others in this manner? Why does a doctor or lawyer think for others? Why do they not listen to what a person often knows best, instead they listen to what they have been brainwashed instead. I say brainwashed, because that is what they get during medical school. They are taught to dissociate from patients, they are taught to not listen to patients, instead listen to their theory books, they are taught absolute nonsense IMHO, very little of which help many nowadays, until you find the one doctor who is different from the majority, and listens. Amazingly enough, when you find them they suddenly find what is wrong, instead of using self ignorance as their means too justification. I have a pretty low regard for most within the medical fields, because too often they think they know everything, instead of accepting their theory is only a guide and basis to what life is really about.

I feel for you Limbo... I really do. It is so sad seeing to see how humanity can treat humanity itself.
 
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