BPD Living with BPD


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I have been working everyday towards accepting my BPD, and having a hard time while grieving letting go of drugs that I do have a very messy relationships with. Addiction will always be there, and so will this disorder. I'm wondering if other people that struggle with a disorder like borderline personality disorder or a disorder is general; how do you cope with literally just being a functional human being in society while you are having an internal battle with yourself every f*cking day. Months ago I got to the point where I straight up could not handle being in public could not, not have a mental emotional breakdown at work during my breaks and keeping it together while serving people. I am 22 years old, how will this affect the rest of my life, how will I deal with future endings and sad moments of life when I feel every emotion either so intensely or nothing at all so many times through out the day.

I am about to read this new book my treatment team recommended for me to read, "Codependent No More." I will probably post about what I think of it. Books like these I usually annotate in my notebook and write notes that I find interesting or what I relate to; I need to find myself and this is where I am starting.
You can recover from a BPD diagnosis. It takes work- more than anything it takes fearless self compassion. It's not your fault u learnt to experience yourself and the world this way- its really really painful and it can get better. Anyone who thinks Bpd is a life diagnosis needs to read up on the research. For people who go after support it's not. Your sensitivity and vulnerability will be there- but this degree of suffering, unrest, pain and self viciousness don't have to be x