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Lost It At Boyfriend!

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jennifer0506

Learning
hello.
I lost it earlier, I got so angry, my boyfriend went without saying goodbye as he had to go quickly from instant messenger which slightly annoyed me. When he said his computer turned off, I said the comment don't worry you weren't talking to me much anyway. And he said you hardly were. And it made me angry. And then he kept asking what was wrong and to promise I'm okay, but he said it in an 'what's wrong now' way and I said nothing. And then he said there obviously is something and then he said fine I'm going. And I just got so angry, and I got steadily more and more angry. He made out my anger was cause I was gonna be on my period soon. And I started crying and screaming and I hung up again and again, and then I rung back and he apologized for repeatedly asking what was wrong, but when I apologized for yelling and getting out of control he was just like yeah well I get the brunt of it all and your always accusing me of something.

I feel like he's not trying to understand me.

I explained I was feeling extra stressed as my mum and dad aren't supporting me from being recently diagnosed and are in denial about it, he then laid on about how I always take things out on him. He also implied that now I had been diagnosed I was using it for an excuse for what I do and that now I know about my complex ptsd I'm over exagerating the symptoms.

I've asked him to read about PTSD to understand me more but I doubt he will. It's not as if he's not supportive, if it wasn't for him I'd still be carrying on with no help whatsoever, but I don't think he realized how serious it is and that he's acting like a trigger for me AT the moment, making out I'm exagerating and it's just my period.

I'm sorry. I had to rant. This is the only place I feel I have people who understand me. Thankyou for the support I'm getting here.
 
Jennifer;
Definately ask him to read some books. This is a serious disorder and if he doesn't have his 'ducks in a row', so to speak, he will be a detriment to your healing. He needs to understand that you are going to be going through some very intense emotions, especially in the beginning of your healing, and he absolutely can't take that personally (although you need to try and recognize where the emotions are coming from and not blame him). Sometimes you'll be able to do this, sometimes you'll slip. Takes a strong balanced person to be in a relationship with someone with PTSD.
Really ask him to read some books and it's a good idea to go for a walk, leave the room, just say "I'm angry," instead of acting out on it..........just let him know your having a hard time. Perhaps after he understands some more...........you won't get it blamed on your period. I dislike that too.
 
yeah the boy has got to try to understand your situation. otherwise he will react to you incorrectly and the miscommunications will spiral and it will get worse. maybe you have a friend who could sit down with him if you cannot do it?

IMO communication is key and both parties in a relationship need to understand the ground from which the other one speaks, otherwise everything gets all muddled.

but it's not easy.
be brave.
 
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